177 SelfWork: Sleep or Sex? How To Balance Both Your Needs and Desires

Sleep and sex – how does a couple balance out these two needs and desires?  How many times have I heard a couple argue about whether or not they’re having enough sex. One will usually say I’m too exhausted. The other feels rejected. Both feel unappreciated and hurt.  I'll offer a couple of tips from experts and couples themselves about how they balance two different libidos and two different sleep styles while managing to reach a compromise. And by the way, there was a study done several years ago that tested different factors (including level of salary)  to see which ones might lead to greater life satisfaction and sense of happiness. The two that were most powerful? Sexual satisfaction (being content in your sex life) and sleep – getting enough of it. That’s an eye opener for sure.

The listener email today is from someone who wants to know how to talk with her spouse about abuse she suffered as a child. I’ll give her my answer!

Important Links:

Dr. Pat Love's Hot Monogamy

One of Dr. David Schnarch's first books on sexual intimacy and couples.

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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