443 SelfWork: What to Do About Emotional Manipulation

Apr 25, 2025

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Emotional manipulation can be hard to figure out. But when you do, it's also hard to know what to do about it.

So today, I’m going to use two such questions from listeners to give you some ideas. First is from a mom who took care of her granddaughter a lot early on – and now feels that her daughter and her relationship has become toxic and the daughter is withholding her child from her.

Second is from a woman who has “lots” kids with a man she’s been married to for many years. But she also writes that he's intensely enmeshed with his parents, choosing to spend much time with them over her, their kids, and/or her parents. And then blames her for not supporting him. What she seems to be describing is not having any true trust or shared goals with her husband.

Here are three helpful questions to ask yourself is you're the victim of emotional manipulation:

How do you figure out you’re being manipulated?
What are you afraid will happen if you confront the manipulation? .
If you choose to act, what’s a healthy way to move forward?

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