The most important difference is the control you have over your emotions. When we react, it is an emotional knee-jerk snap. It is usually as a result of someone 'pushing our buttons'. We can go from 0 to 100 in seconds. It is sometimes as if we are being taken over by another force as we feel the uncontrollable need to immediately and vehemently attack or defend. You may be thinking, is there any other way?

The good news is no matter how 'wrong' or abusive the other person or situation is, you do not have to react with an emotional explosion. You can choose to respond in a firm but calm manner.Responding can only come when you give yourself the time and space after the comment or situation that upset you. You begin to look at the 'upset' as a 'set up', an opportunity to look at your triggers, your part in the situation.

Diane Dempster discusses triggers in our latest Team Talk podcast. This is part 1 of a 4 part series regarding triggers and how to overcome them.

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JBD Team Talks: Why are they yelling? The anatomy of a trigger (Pt I)