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Shameless Sex

#219 How to Have More Sex and Better Intimacy - with Sex Therapist Ian Kerner, PhD

Apr 13, 2021
Ian Kerner, PhD, a sex therapist and author, joins the hosts to talk about uncovering couple's repetitive sex scripts through discussing the last time they had sex. He shares tips on rewriting old sex scripts for better intimacy and more sex. The hosts also address a sex question about helping a wife achieve orgasm. They discuss the importance of communication, trying new things, and using toys to enhance pleasure. The podcast covers topics such as factors affecting arousal, finding sex coaches, breaking free from sex scripts, and incorporating presence and arousal into sex life.
56:25

Episode guests

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

  • Couples should rewrite their sex scripts to explore outer course activities for more pleasure and connection.
  • Psychological arousal is just as important as physical touch in achieving sexual satisfaction.

Deep dives

The Importance of Rewriting Sex Scripts

One of the main insights discussed in the podcast episode is the significance of rewriting sex scripts in order to improve sexual experiences. The speaker emphasizes that many couples rely heavily on intercourse, which can create pressure and performance anxiety. Instead, the focus should shift towards exploring a variety of behaviors and combinations, known as outer course, that can enhance pleasure and connection. By breaking free from societal norms and embracing erotic creativity, couples can experience more fulfilling and enjoyable sex.

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