225 FOCUSED Member Chat: Emotional Regulation with Michael Johnson
Aug 22, 2023
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Michael Johnson, an ADHD coach, shares his journey with ADHD, emotional regulation, and personal growth. They discuss the importance of emotional regulation, the impact of self-judgment, and self-soothing in unhealthy ways. They explore the significance of emotional safety in relationships and becoming a safe person. The podcast also emphasizes the importance of self-care and choosing an ADHD-friendly coaching program. The chapter on the power of emotions in coaching highlights the role of emotions in achieving success.
Emotional regulation is the number one skill for adults with ADHD to learn.
Creating a safe space for others to express and regulate their emotions helps nurture stronger relationships.
Deep dives
Improving Emotional Regulation and ADHD Symptoms
The podcast episode highlights the importance of emotional regulation in managing ADHD symptoms and improving overall well-being. The host, Kristen Carter, discusses her personal experience with ADHD and the challenges she faced in relationships, work, and achieving goals. She emphasizes the significance of understanding one's unique brain and unlocking its potential. The guest, Michael, shares his journey with ADHD, including struggles with anxiety, depression, and emotional dysregulation. They discuss the benefits of coaching and learning tools to cope with ADHD symptoms, such as creating space for emotional processing and practicing self-compassion. Michael also emphasizes the importance of having a support system and setting boundaries in relationships and work. The episode highlights the transformative power of emotional regulation and how it can positively impact running businesses and managing responsibilities effectively.
The Role of Emotional Regulation in Relationships
The episode explores the role of emotional regulation in maintaining healthy and safe relationships. Kristen and Michael discuss the challenges of being emotionally immature and relying on others to regulate their emotions. They highlight the importance of taking responsibility for self-regulation and creating a safe space for others to express their emotions. They share personal experiences of codependency, fear of abandonment, and the need for validation. The episode emphasizes the importance of nurturing oneself and allowing others to take care of their own emotions. Through self-reflection and coaching, they have learned to regulate their emotions and create stronger, more fulfilling relationships.
Overcoming Overwhelm and Prioritizing Self-Care
The episode addresses the issue of overwhelm and the impact it can have on productivity and well-being. Kristen and Michael discuss how overwhelm is not a sign to do more but rather a cue to pause, reflect, and process emotions. They highlight the benefits of honoring one's emotional state and engaging in self-care practices, such as going for a walk or finding moments of stillness. The episode emphasizes the value of slowing down to speed up and working ahead by creating space for emotional regulation. By giving oneself permission to feel and process emotions, individuals can navigate overwhelming situations and achieve greater productivity.
Transitioning from Fixing to Supporting Others
The podcast episode delves into the journey of transitioning from a fixer mentality to a supportive approach in relationships. Kristen and Michael discuss the tendency to fix others' emotions and the importance of setting boundaries. They highlight the significance of recognizing that adults are responsible for their own emotions and that everyone has different needs and coping mechanisms. The episode explores the role of emotional regulation in relationships and the benefits of providing support and empathy without trying to fix every problem. They share personal experiences of growth and self-reflection, as well as the challenges and rewards of fostering healthier, more balanced relationships.
In this episode, I’m joined by my FOCUSED client Michael Johnson, who shares his ADHD journey that led him to being coached and now becoming a coach himself.
I love our conversation because Michael is so open and honest about his weaknesses and the self-discovery that led to him evolving into a much more self-aware and balanced person today.
If you've struggled with horrible self-talk, disordered eating, and difficult relationships, this episode is going to be right up your alley.
In case you haven’t had enough of ME talking about emotional regulation, Michael discusses from a client perspective why he truly believes it is the number one skill for adults with ADHD to learn.
Do you ever feel that your ADHD symptoms aren’t actually the biggest problem, but instead it’s the layers of self-judgment and blame that you pile on top of yourself after noticing the symptom holding you back?
Have your lack of emotional regulation skills led to you self-soothing in unhealthy ways that keep you in a bad cycle?