The Keys to a Long Term Relationship & How Our Minds Are Quirky - SYSK Choice

7 snips

Oct 26, 2024

Guest

David Myers

Guest

George Blair-West

George Blair-West, a psychiatrist and author, reveals that for lasting relationships, communication and commitment matter more than romantic love. He draws intriguing comparisons with arranged marriages, suggesting they can foster deeper bonds. Alongside him, David Myers, a social psychologist, highlights the quirky nature of human perception, explaining our tendency to overestimate others' happiness and our affinity for things that resonate with our identities. Together, they explore the profound impacts of honesty on health and the fascinating dynamics of connection in love.

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INSIGHT

Lying Harms Your Health

Telling even small lies raises stress and weakens immunity, increasing colds and flu risk.
The Notre Dame study found truth-tellers had fewer mental and physical complaints over 10 weeks.

INSIGHT

Romantic Love Isn’t A Reliable Compass

Romantic love as the sole decision guide is recent and unreliable for long-term choice.
Many couples slide into commitment without deliberate, long-term thinking, says George Blair-West.

ADVICE

Delay Big Relationship Decisions

Avoid making lifetime decisions during the honeymoon phase when idealization hides flaws.
Test choices by asking how you'll feel about them in 12 months, two years, and five years.

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From a very early age you were likely told not to lie. Lying is bad. And it seems that one of the things it is bad for is your health! This episode begins by explaining how lying affects your health – and not in a good way. https://newsinfo.nd.edu/news/32424-study-telling-fewer-lies-linked-to-better-health-relationships

The idea of marrying someone for love is a relatively recent concept when you look back through human history. Today, it is often the primary reason for marriage. Yet if you look at the divorce statistics, love may not be the magic ingredient to long term relationships. While we are not likely to go back to arranged marriages, there may be something we can learn from them, says psychiatrist George Blair-West author of the book How to Make the Biggest Decision of Your Life (https://amzn.to/3gQPTyD). Listen as he explains what really works in keeping a relationship together – and it isn’t romantic love.

The human mind works in odd ways. For one thing, we tend to be overconfident in our abilities. We often think other people are having more fun than we are. We also tend to like things simply because they remind us of us – like the letters in your name or the numbers in your birthday! Here to explain all this is David G. Myers. He is a social psychologist and professor of psychology at Hope College and author of a book How Do We Know Ourselves?: Curiosities and Marvels of the Human Mind (https://amzn.to/3fqyP1Z).

Every good cook knows you should NEVER wash or rinse mushrooms, you should brush them. That is because mudrooms soak up water like a sponge and that ruins them. But what if that isn’t really true? Listen as I explain. Source: Harold McGee author of On Food and Cooking (https://amzn.to/3UeclA2).

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