The Hello Someday Podcast For Sober Curious Women Ep. 34: Quit Drinking With Identity Based Habits, Because Willpower Doesn’t Work.
Now back to How to Quit Drinking With Identity Based Habits, Because Willpower Doesn’t Work.
There are easy ways and hard ways to break the habit of drinking.
And if you’ve tried a bunch of times to get sober momentum and given up after 2 weeks or 2 months, I’m betting that you’ve tried ALL the hard ways to stop drinking and it’s brought you back to the same place.
In this episode I’m going to share with you the research and framework behind how to break your habit of drinking once and for all, without relying on willpower, white-knuckling it or hating the process.
What I’ve found in the coaching work I do with women is that approaching not drinking based on the research into what works in terms of long term behavior change is the most powerful, logical and sustainable way to become a happy and healthy non-drinker.
And the best book I’ve found on how to change your habits and behavior is Atomic Habits by James Clear.
Here’s what doesn’t work when you’re trying to stop drinking:
- Shaming or blaming yourself for drinking again when the physical, social and emotional environment you live in has set you up for failure
- Relying on hitting a low enough ‘bottom’ so that you’ll finally have the motivation to not drink and the willpower to resist alcohol
- Keeping your wine (or your alcohol of choice) in your home (so that you don’t have to ask your partner to change their behavior)
- Relying on your partner, family and drinking friends as your main source of support for changing your relationship with alcohol
If you’ve tried to stop drinking before and don’t seem to get very far there are a lot of reasons why what you’ve been doing up until now hasn’t been working.
Here’s what you’ll learn in today’s episode about the ways to change your behavior and stop drinking in a way that’s easier and set up in a way for long term success.
- How to prime your physical environment and social support to overcome the moments when willpower isn’t enough and motivation fades
- Why true behavior change is based on identity change - who you believe you are. Because when you change your identity from a “red wine or chardonnay girl” to a “healthy, happy, confident and inspiring woman who doesn't drink anymore because she feels better and does more without it” - then, when you don’t drink, you are simply acting IN ALIGNMENT with who you are
- How to get rid of the limiting beliefs and fears you have about what your life will look like without drinking
- Why it's important to focus on your trajectory (the path that you are on and where it is leading you) rather than your end goal
- How altering the media and messages you surround yourself with (including the messages you tell yourself) can be the difference between success and failure
Links and resources mentioned
Grab a copy of Atomic Habits by James Clear
Podcast episodes on how to prime your mindset, physical and social environment for success in quitting drinking
Episode 2 - 5 Mistakes Women Make When Quitting Drinking
Episode 3 - 7 Strategies To Get You Through Your First Week Without Alcohol
Episode 10 - 10 Things You Need In Your Sober Toolkit
Episode 23 - Feeling Bored In Sobriety? Things To Know + What To Do
Connect with Casey McGuire Davidson
Grab your Free Sober Girls Guide To Quitting Drinking
Get support during the holiday season from women who are on the alcohol-free path with the guide on How to find and join my Favorite Private Sober Facebook groups
Website: www.hellosomedaycoaching.com