It’s All Your Fault: High Conflict People REBROADCAST: Part 2: Borderline Personality Disorder for Family Members
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Aug 18, 2022 Amanda Smith, a licensed clinical social worker and BPD expert, shares essential insights for families of those with Borderline Personality Disorder. She discusses common emotional reactions and emphasizes the importance of self-care for loved ones. Amanda advises on setting healthy boundaries and utilizing planned separations for relationship resets. She elaborates on the role of therapy, both individual and couples, while cautioning against blunt labeling of BPD. Ultimately, she offers hope for recovery and healing by combining empathy with necessary limits.
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Common Family Reactions
- Family members often feel fear, worry, or self-blame after a loved one shows borderline patterns.
- Amanda Smith stresses they are not the cause of the loved one’s emotional pain and should avoid taking it personally.
Use Temporary Separations As Resets
- Prioritize safety and consider temporary separations when relationships feel untenable or unsafe.
- Use planned breaks (a 'family vacation') as a reset without abandoning the relationship permanently.
90-Day Separation That Reset A Family
- Amanda described a couple who used a 90-day temporary separation as a reset while still meeting briefly each day.
- The separation allowed the husband to get DBT support and parenting training, and helped the family regroup.