Why Some Breakups Hurt So Much More Than Others

Have you ever gone through a breakup so painful it made you question who you even are? The kind that leaves you replaying every moment, wondering what went wrong, and feeling like a stranger in your own skin? When love ends and your identity goes with it, how do you start again?

In this Language of Love session, I answer a heartfelt question from Heather, who writes in after a devastating breakup that shattered her sense of self. She’s stuck in a loop of rumination and regret, trying to figure out how to stop looking back and begin moving forward.

We talk about how some breakups don’t just end relationships; they awaken old pain that’s been waiting beneath the surface. I explain why trauma “loves an open door,” how grief and loss can resurface long after we think we’ve healed, and why true recovery starts with rediscovering who you are beyond anyone else.

We dive into: 

• How old trauma gets triggered by new loss
• The difference between self-esteem and self-worth
• Why your sense of self must come from within, not from your partner
• The power of trauma-informed therapy in heartbreak recovery
• What the Runaway Bride movie can teach us about self-discovery
• How to figure out “what kind of eggs you like,” literally and metaphorically
• Why being centered in your worth changes who and what you attract
• How heartbreak can become the doorway to your most authentic self

If you’ve ever lost yourself in love, this episode will remind you that healing isn’t about finding someone new; it’s about finding you.

Don’t forget to visit my website and explore the resources there. They’re all designed to help you create deeper, more fulfilling love in your life. You can also take the free quiz, “What Do You Really Want in Love?” It’s a great way to get clear on what your heart’s truly looking for.

And if you have a question or want to be part of a future Language of Love session, just email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com

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