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 It’s been a rough year for Nate and Nora. 

Their marriage has been a relatively peaceful and comfortable one, but now things are different. Navigating Nate’s faith transition has been difficult for both of them. Nate is seemingly sprinting down this new path and Nora, while she makes efforts to understand, needs more time and patience than Nate is willing to provide. While recent changes have brought some newfound beauty and depth to their relationship, she often finds herself craving the stability and certainty of the past.

In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Nate and Nora see how they have each handled their fear and anxiety in destructive ways – Nora becoming rigid and Nate turning to condescension. These strategies are compelling because they are an easy escape from the intensity and discomfort of marital growth and expansion. Dr. Finlayson-Fife explains that the path to more stability and connection in their relationship is differentiation – learning to tolerate the aloneness and invalidation that comes when you love someone who sees and experiences the world differently than you do.