Is it hard for you to give or get feedback virtually? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Marcus Buckingham, a cohead of the ADP Research Institute and the author of Nine Lies About Work: A Freethinking Leader’s Guide to the Real World. They talk through what to do when you want to tell your boss they’re derailing virtual meetings, you’re starting a new job remotely and getting little guidance, or you want more feedback on your organization’s performance during the pandemic.

From Alison and Dan’s reading list:

HBR: Why Asking for Advice Is More Effective Than Asking for Feedback by Jaewon Yoon, Hayley Blunden, Ariella Kristal, and Ashley Whillans — “Organizations are full of opportunities to learn from peers, colleagues, and clients. Despite its prevalence, asking for feedback is often an ineffective strategy for promoting growth and learning. Our work suggests this is because when givers focus too much on evaluating past actions, they fail to provide tangible recommendations for future ones. How can we overcome this barrier? By asking our peers, clients, colleagues, and bosses for advice instead.”

Book: Nine Lies About Work: A Freethinking Leader’s Guide to the Real World by Marcus Buckingham and Ashley Goodall — “What we, as team members, want from you, our team leader, is firstly that you make us feel part of something bigger, that you show us how what we are doing together is important and meaningful; and secondly, that you can make us feel that you can see us, and connect to us, and care about us, and challenge us, in a way that recognizes who we are as individuals.”

HBR: Starting a New Job — Remotely by Art Markman — “You should always be proactive in getting acclimated to a new role but when you won’t work side-by-side your new colleagues for the foreseeable future, it’s especially imperative that you take an active approach to getting up to speed.”

HBR: How to Manage an Employee Who’s Struggling to Perform Remotely by Ron Carucci — “With many unfamiliar variables introduced by Covid-19, getting to the bottom of a new performance problem is more complicated. Prior to the pandemic, most leaders might have reflexively zeroed in on the underperformer as the primary unit of analysis and presumed the problem was the result of insufficient skills, lack of initiative, commitment, and/or a poor attitude.”

Stretched Between Gratitude and Grief: A Conversation with Francis Weller