Exploring toddler's self-harming behavior and providing strategies to address it, focusing on trust and encouragement. Emphasizing the importance of creating a safe space for children to express emotions and offering alternatives to harmful actions.
10:19
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Quick takeaways
Parents should stay calm and offer alternatives to self-harming behaviors during children's emotional outbursts.
Viewing tantrums as a healthy emotional release and providing safety boundaries without interference helps children develop emotional self-regulation.
Deep dives
Understanding Children's Self-Harming Behavior
Children may exhibit self-harming behaviors like biting or hitting themselves during tantrums or moments of frustration. Parents often react emotionally, but it's crucial to remain calm to prevent reinforcing such behaviors. By maintaining trust and not escalating the situation, children can learn to navigate their emotions without harmful actions. Offering gentle alternatives like a teething rind can redirect self-destructive behavior positively.
Promoting Emotional Venting Safely
Parents should view tantrums as a healthy emotional release for children. Reacting with trust and providing safety boundaries without suppressing emotions helps children develop resilience. Encouraging children to express their feelings without interference aids in their emotional self-regulation. Offering subtle suggestions during meltdowns, like providing safety measures without disrupting emotional venting, fosters a healthier emotional outlet.
Avoiding Reinforcement of Harmful Behavior
Avoid reinforcing self-harming behaviors by overreacting or trying to immediately stop them. Subtle actions, such as placing a blanket under the child's head during headbanging without drawing attention, can protect the child without giving power to the harmful behavior. Trusting the child to process emotions and providing safe outlets allows for natural emotional development.
Janet answers a question from a parent whose toddler resorts to hurting himself when he’s angry or frustrated, and she’s wondering if there are some “better options” to teach him when he’s expressing his emotions.
For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible.
Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com).
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