Talking To Teens: Expert Tips for Parenting Teenagers cover image

Talking To Teens: Expert Tips for Parenting Teenagers

Ep 261: What Your Teen’s Music Says About Them

Oct 1, 2023
27:31

Susan Rogers, author of This Is What It Sounds Like, offers insight into what different tastes in music reveal about personality. Plus, how parents and teens can connect more deeply by sharing and exploring music.  


Sponsored by Equip: Eating disorder treatment that works—delivered at home. Visit equip.health/talking for more information, and a free consultation.

Full Show Notes

Music is deeply personal, especially for teenagers. In this episode, we’re exploring what your teen’s music taste says about them and how you can use music to connect more deeply.

We’re joined by Susan Rogers, a cognitive neuroscientist, award-winning professor at Berklee College of Music, multi-platinum record producer, and author. With decades of experience in the music industry and a PhD researching music perception and cognition, Susan has rare insight into both the art and science of music.

In our conversation, Susan explains that musical tastes are highly individualized, tapping into our inner psyche and self-image. Criticizing your teen’s music taste can feel like a personal attack to them. Instead, Susan suggests having a “record pull” where family members take turns playing music they love for each other. This allows everyone to glimpse into each other’s musical psyche.

What Your Teen’s Taste Reveals

We discuss fascinating research Susan conducted asking people what visuals and memories they associate with their favorite music. Results showed the majority of people see autobiographical memories, allowing them to relive happy moments from their past. For teens, this often means music from when they were younger.

Susan explains music activates the brain’s “default network” tied to our sense of self. So when teens listen to music they relate to, it becomes deeply enmeshed with their personal identity. Lyrics often take a backseat, Susan says, with musical qualities resonating more deeply.

Using Music to Connect

With the teenage brain still developing areas related to identity and self-perception, what teens believe their peers think of them becomes what they think of themselves. Susan suggests asking teens openly about their music, not to criticize their taste but to understand them better.

Playing music you relate to for your teen can also help them understand you, glimpsing into your psyche. Susan proposes a “record pull” where family members share meaningful music with each other.

Additional Topics:

  • How streaming led to highly individualized musical taste
  • Dance and musical style reflecting generational culture
  • Processing lyrics versus musical qualities
  • Areas of the teenage brain still under construction


Sponsored by Equip: Eating disorder treatment that works—delivered at home. Visit equip.health/talking for more information, and a free consultation.

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