The Adversity Advantage with Doug Bopst The Science of Cheating, Dating & Attraction | Macken Murphy
Jul 31, 2025
Macken Murphy, an evolutionary biologist and Oxford graduate, delves into the science behind attraction and infidelity. He discusses why people cheat, emphasizing that relationship dissatisfaction often drives this behavior. Murphy also reveals red flags to watch for and explains how attraction shifts in committed relationships. He highlights the crucial role of physical appearance in dating while underscoring how deeper qualities matter long-term. Throughout, he ties these insights to our evolutionary instincts, making complex behaviors relatable and intriguing.
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True Motivations for Cheating
- People often say they cheat due to relationship dissatisfaction but downplay physical attraction motivations.
- Most prefer their affair partner's physical attractiveness even if they don't admit it.
Push and Pull of Infidelity
- Infidelity is driven by both push factors, like relationship problems, and pull factors, like physical attraction.
- Temptation is harder to resist when relationship quality declines but attractive opportunities remain.
Preventing Infidelity
- Focus on keeping your primary relationship happy to reduce reasons for your partner to cheat.
- Being cheated on is not necessarily your fault, so avoid self-blame.