The Secure Love Podcast with Julie Menanno Session 15: Healing the Wound of "Not Mattering"
Dec 16, 2025
Bethany and Brian tackle the complex dynamics of their relationship, revealing deep-seated childhood wounds. Brian shares his fears of feeling replaceable, stemming from painful memories of his upbringing. Both partners grapple with the feeling of not mattering, which fuels their conflicts. As they navigate these emotions, they uncover the significance of acknowledging each other's vulnerabilities. This candid exploration highlights how shared fears can hinder connection, offering a poignant lesson in love and understanding.
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Golden Boy Replaced After Disney Trip
- Brian describes a childhood memory of being the "golden boy" who was taken to Disney World and later dropped when his uncle had a child.
- That early experience resurfaced when he felt his daughter was being sidelined, fueling his sarcastic protests.
Treat Mean Words By Healing Roots
- Address harmful behavior by exploring its emotional root, not only by condemning words.
- Help the person name the pain and co-create healthier ways to get needs met so mean words stop.
Strep Incident That Triggered Him
- Brian recounts a recent event where Bethany isolated his older daughter during illness, which he saw as segregation.
- He felt outraged because both children had the same illness and his daughter seemed excluded from family life.