Sons of Patriarchy Healing from Evangelicalism
Sep 8, 2025
Michelle Moffitt, a psychotherapist and founder of Five Oaks Counseling, shares her journey escaping the constraints of a conservative church. She discusses the trauma of being a pastor's wife and the emotional isolation faced when seeking help. Moffitt emphasizes the importance of trusting one’s intuition and finding trauma-informed therapists. She offers practical advice for people leaving high-control religious systems, advocating for community support and gradual exposure to new ideas. Ultimately, she encourages embracing complexity and learning to trust oneself.
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Trauma Drove Her Into Conservatism
- Michelle Moffitt recounts being roofied and raped in college, which drove her to seek safety in a conservative church community.
- That community promised protection through strict rules and belonging, prompting her to join despite her progressive upbringing.
Early Marriage Deceptions And Pressure To Stay
- Michelle describes early marriage discoveries: her husband lied about many things and later displayed pornography and deception.
- She felt trapped because divorce felt impossible in her religious context, so she tried harder to make the marriage work.
Church Plant Assessments Favor Charismatic Men
- Michelle explains the PCA church-plant assessment that emphasizes male leadership and screens for charismatic church planters.
- She notes assessors often favored narcissistic, charming men who could sell the gospel and raise funds while wives provided unpaid labor.
