5 Ways Overfunctioning Kills Your Pleasure (and What to Do Instead)

You have done the healing. You know your patterns and your attachment style. You set boundaries and stopped abandoning yourself. Yet when life gets hard, or someone is disappointed in you, you still end up doing the emotional labor.

You collapse or you over-function. Your relationships have not shifted as much as you have. Your sex life feels flatter than it should. Your aliveness and turn-on feel inconsistent. You have grown on the inside, but the world has not adjusted to meet you.

Pleasure requires presence, sensation, receiving, and truth. Super Traits demand scanning, fixing, anticipating, managing, and performing. Therapy, nervous system work, EMDR, trying to want sex, and communication tools were a good foundation, but not enough because Super Traits pull you out of the conditions required for pleasure and connection.

Super Traits pull you into your head, where hyper vigilance replaces feeling. They turn you into the emotional container who regulates everyone else. They reward performance rather than presence, and they create loneliness even when you want connection.

They train you to choose harmony over truth, and suppressed truth kills desire. They make receiving uncomfortable, so pleasure cannot land because it never reaches you.

This creates a pleasure-suppressed life. Flatness. Numbness. Only feeling pleasure when everything is perfect. Freezing or fawning when things are hard. Over-functioning under stress. Craving more but not knowing what you want. Carrying the emotional load and trying to fix the connection instead of influencing it.

Pleasure is intelligence. Pleasure tells you what is true, what you want, when you are abandoning yourself, and when someone is not meeting you. Super Traits drown out that internal guidance system. Insight does not create influence. Presence and pleasure do.

If you want your world and relationships to respond to the woman you have already become, apply for The Super Trait Society HERE.

If you do not know your Super Traits, take the free Super Trait Quiz HERE.