According to a CPP global human capital study, 89% of employees let their conflicts with co-workers escalate. My guest today, Kristine Scott, is out to build a future where the energy of conflict gets harnessed to create pro-social change, not division.
Kristine shares how she got into this work of coaching teams on how to resolve conflict and what she learned from young people on the street dealing with conflict effectively. We talk about why most of us prefer to avoid conflict and the false narrative we tell ourselves about our ability to emotionally connect. Kristine offers a 3-step formula for resolving conflict and gives examples of it in action. We also discuss how self-awareness and self-reflection are the keys to effectively handling conflict while also protecting your own mental health.
To access the episode transcript, please click on the episode title at TheEmpathyEdge.com
Key Takeaways:
- Most people prefer to avoid conflict because they think they’re bad at it. We are more likely to remember the times we failed at conflict resolution, not the times we handled it successfully.
- If there’s something that regularly gets under your skin, take a deeper look. Understand whether it is the action that is bothering you, or if it is what that action represents that is a trigger.
- Supervisors assume the conflict is repaired more often than it is, which can lead to performance issues and tension within the organization.
- Conflict often arises because people don’t feel heard. You can’t always solve the problem, but you can always listen with empathy and help them understand that they’re heard.
"We all have our weak points about the things that really get under our skin, and we lose all objectivity. We can work on that old stuff. We can get support, do a little therapy, and come back to not be so reactive." — Kristine Scott
Episode References:
From Our Partner:
Download the 2024 Ninth Annual State of Workplace Empathy study from Businessolver: businessolver.com/edge
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About Kristine Scott, Chief Trainer, Seattle Conflict Resolution
Kristine Scott is the founder and chief trainer for Seattle Conflict Resolution. She has taken over 20 years of lessons from high-incident social service settings and distilled truths and techniques in non-violent conflict response. What began as training for staff and volunteers became so popular she was sought out by hotels, doctors' offices, and others. She founded the company in 2018 and is now the go-to trainer for Seattle Space Needle and Seattle Farmers Markets. Her customers return because she helps them use conflict to build loyalty through compassionate boundary setting.
As of 2024, Ms. Scott has trained over 37,000 people. She promotes a future where the energy of conflict gets harnessed to create pro-social change, not division. In addition to being a trainer, Kristine is also a regular podcast guest, and media source (USA Today).
Connect with Kristine:
Seattle Conflict Resolution: seattleconflictresolution.com
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kristinemariescott
Course for Customer Service professionals; Angry Customers, Happy Resolutions available at seattleconflictresolution.com
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The Empathy Edge