This classic discussion dives into how ADHD can make us our own worst enemies, highlighting self-sabotaging behaviors like poor time management, procrastination, and overcommitting. Emphasizing the importance of self-compassion, it encourages listeners to understand these behaviors as reflections of unmet needs rather than moral failings. The conversation also explores practical ways to move toward a better self through empathy, realistic goal-setting, and identifying emotional needs, ultimately offering a path forward without the pressure of perfection.
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insights INSIGHT
Behaviors Signal Needs, Not Failings
ADHD maladaptive behaviors often signal unmet needs or coping mechanisms rather than moral failings.
Recognizing root causes shifts work from punishment to problem-solving.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Match Fixes To Procrastination Causes
Identify the specific cause of procrastination before trying to stop it.
Match the solution to the cause, e.g., redefine 'done', increase stimulation, or break tasks down.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Use Compassion To Spot Triggers
Use self-compassion to understand triggers rather than moralizing incidents.
Track conditions (sleep, food, stress) that precede maladaptive reactions to prevent repeats.
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This week, we're revisiting a classic episode inspired by a late '90s pop-punk anthem: "My Own Worst Enemy" by Lit.
The title of that song perfectly captures a feeling common to those with ADHD. We often feel like our own greatest obstacle, plagued by an endless supply of self-destructive behaviors stemming directly from the condition.
Counterproductive manifestations like poor time management, hyper-focusing on low-priority tasks, overcommitting, and procrastination can leave us feeling incredibly frustrated.
We're talking about our "worst self"—the version of us that emerges in ways we later regret or that seem to actively work against our own interests.
While the internet is full of advice on how to become your best self, the reality is that many of these frustrating behaviors do not reflect our value as people. Instead, they are often a reflection of our unmet needs and coping mechanisms.
In this important rebroadcast, we discuss:
How this "worst self" manifests in the context of ADHD.
Why we should extend a bit more empathy toward these maladaptive behaviors.
Practical ways to work on moving forward—not necessarily toward a flawless best self, but at least toward a better one.
Tune in to explore this internal conflict and learn how to find compassion for the parts of you that struggle.
Approach the idea of your worst self with empathy. Focus on the fact that you developed these maladaptive behaviors for a reason.
Pay attention to the situations and emotions that trigger your worst behaviors to anticipate and manage them more effectively.
Often, our maladaptive behaviors come out when we're not doing a good job of meeting our basic needs. If we're engaging in numbing behaviors, we can look below the symptoms to try and see what's setting them off.
Hacking Your ADHD