E203: Stress and Loneliness in Ecommerce - An Interview with Dr. Sherry Walling

Now, this isn’t the first time I’ve talked about these two things on a podcast. In episode 192, you’ll recall that Dave and I went through our stress points as entrepreneurs. This time around we’ve invited an expert to shed more light on this topic from a medical standpoint.

Dr. Sherry Walling is a clinical psychologist and the driving force behind Zen Founder, where she helps both up and coming entrepreneurs and established business owners navigate their own mental and emotional pain points.

Here are some takeaways from our discussion.

“The scarcity of time certainly causes a lot of stress and the misallocation of time can drive a lot of loneliness.”

Sherry references one of Sigmund Freud’s Defense Mechanisms. Sublimination is when we take our impulses and channel it into something entirely different, doing it in a way that is socially acceptable.  

Entrepreneurs are disruptors. We ditched the cube and hacked the system. If we are successful, we get praised for it. If we fail, people call us foolish. Most of us develop a complicated relationship with risk, with rule-breaking and going against the flow. And these certainly play to some addictive tendencies, which can then lead to stress and feeling isolated.

“It’s okay to do the deep dive but know that you’re choosing that. Know that it comes with significant sacrifices in your relationships. Make sure you’re okay with that.”

Getting a bigger pile of money or hiring more employees requires devoting more time and energy to the business. This could mean making significant sacrifices in other aspects of life. Nothing wrong with that as long as we are fully aware that this is a choice we are making willingly.

“Are you going to build things that will outlast you? Or are you going to rest on your laurels and spend your money?”

We go through different stages of life. Sherry says that from our 20s to our 40s are what’s called the “deep building” years. It's the height of our professional and personal development. But at 40, there’s a shift that happens in terms of tasks and goals. Our wants and needs change.

“Some people talk about work-life balance as if it’s the equitable distribution across these different domains of our life and I don’t think that works for most of us. But I think it’s that sense of whatever you’re doing, be there. Do that fully.”

Having focus is important because it improves the quality of relationships and drives business growth too.

Listen to the entire podcast for more of the insightful interview that I had with Dr. Sherry Walling.

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