Beyond Monogamy: Sex, Love, and Connections

We’re sold the fairy tale from birth: find “the one,” make them your everything, and you’ll live happily ever after. But what happens if that one person can’t meet all your needs - or ever could? In this convention challenging conversation, sex experts Dr. Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman take aim at America’s deeply rooted ideas about monogamy, intimacy, and what makes for a fulfilling - and lasting - relationship.

Host Gabe Howard points out America’s strange mix of selling sex while shaming it, and together they unpack why so many couples struggle in silence instead of having honest, non-blaming conversations about their desires. Along the way, they reveal how redefining intimacy, owning your choices, and using your “sexual energy” as a navigation system can lead to more connection, better sex, and improved mental health.

Key Take-aways:

• Why “the one” isn’t true for everyone and could set you up for failure.
• How monogamy, open relationships, and other structures can all work - if you choose them deliberately.
• Practical tips for starting sensitive sex conversations without triggering alarm bells.

If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship rules are helping or hurting your love life, this episode just might change everything.

“So monogamy is originated in feudalist society when there was like, someone who had money and, you know, possession. We moved into needing to know who our offsprings are. And that's exactly what monogamy started, because we wanted to know where are we inheriting our money to and the church came in and religion and it started to become like a, a standard to live by. But it's not necessarily our nature and it's not necessarily what everyone should be doing.” ~Dr. Danielle Harel

Our guests, Danielle Harel, Ph.D., and Celeste Hirschman, M.A., are pioneers in intimacy, sexuality, and relationship coaching. Co-founders of the Somatica® Institute, they’ve transformed how love and connection are taught through their experiential, science-based Somatica Method. Together, they’ve trained over 1,000 coaches and helped countless individuals and couples embrace vulnerability, rediscover desire, and create deeply fulfilling relationships. Authors of three influential books—Making Love Real, Coming Together, and Confidence—Danielle and Celeste blend authenticity, humor, and bold honesty to inspire transformation. Their relatable insights into intimacy and connection make them captivating guests, offering audiences practical tools to enhance relationships and live passionately.

Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. Gabe is also the host of the "Inside Bipolar" podcast with Dr. Nicole Washington.

Gabe makes his home in the suburbs of Columbus, Ohio. He lives with his supportive wife, Kendall, and a Miniature Schnauzer dog that he never wanted, but now can’t imagine life without. To book Gabe for your next event or learn more about him, please visit gabehoward.com.

Thank you for tuning in! Show ideas? Hit us up at show@psychcentral.com.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices