Not Alone

Attachment Theory: Secrets to a Successful Relationship with Julie Menanno

Nov 21, 2023

Exploring attachment theory, licensed therapist Julie Menanno discusses the impact of attachment styles on relationships, the environment for avoidant attachment, the pitfalls of online relationship advice, and the intriguing fact that only half of our attachment needs are met in relationships.

01:05:12

Episode guests

Julie Menanno

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Quick takeaways

Meeting attachment needs in relationships is crucial for success, encompassing feeling valued, validated, appreciated, and trusted.

Recognizing and understanding different attachment styles (secure, anxious, avoidant, disorganized) can aid in improving communication and addressing emotional needs.

Social media's influence on relationships highlights the importance of self-reflection, personal accountability, and fostering connection through awareness and communication.

Deep dives

Understanding Attachment Needs in Relationships

Attachment theory emphasizes the importance of meeting attachment needs in relationships. Thriving relationships are built on around 13 to 15 fundamental attachment needs. These needs include feeling valued, appreciated, understood, validated, trusted, and trusting. Each interaction in a relationship presents an opportunity to either fulfill or neglect these needs, shaping the connection between partners.

Beneficial Book Recommendation for Raising Securely Attached Children

00:56

Relationship Advice and Social Media Influence

01:32

The Power of Surviving

01:20

Introduction

4min

The Transformative Power of Attachment Theory in Therapy

3min

Understanding Attachment Styles and Their Influence on Relationships

6min

Healing Attachment Styles in Relationships

12min

Exploring the Avoidant Dismissive Attachment Style and Childhood Environments

2min

Reflecting on Attachment Styles and Communication in Relationships

20min

Exploring Feminine and Masculine Energies in Relationships

15min

The core idea of attachment theory is that humans, as social beings, have an innate need to form close emotional bonds and attachments with others. It has profound implications for understanding human relationships, including romantic partnerships, friendships, and parent-child relationships.

Valeria welcomes licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Julie Menanno for an eye-opening conversation about our individual attachment needs. We kick things off by exploring the foundations of attachment theory and what it means to parent with an attachment-focused mindset. The different attachment styles take center stage, shedding light on how they shape our emotional bonds and behaviors.

They touch on the typical environment for avoidant attachment and why being dismissive with your partner can be a red flag and the pitfalls of relationship advice found online and why it's often based on conflict. Plus, we'll reveal the intriguing fact that only half of our attachment needs are met in our relationships.

Pre-order Secure Love:

https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Secure-Love/Julie-Menanno/9781668012864

You can find Julie on:

https://www.thesecurerelationship.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thesecurerelationship

https://www.tiktok.com/@thesecurerelationship

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQxvG_HhlW-IOp0WJgRBcCg

Valeria is on:

https://www.instagram.com/valerialipovetsky/

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWkDFq1pO7YNzifE3A4UsMA

https://www.tiktok.com/@valeria.lipovetsky

Not Alone Podcast