Self-talk, what you say to yourself internally, manifests itself in your outward attitude and actions. As any elite athlete will tell you, the mental games you play with yourself between your ears will make or break you. When all things are equal, mindset is one thing that separates winners and losers.
This is one of the reasons that I love golf so much. Once you understand the basic mechanics of the golf swing the only thing that really matters is mindset. On every shot your ability to focus, calm your mind, and remain mentally disciplined is the thin line between brilliance and disaster. Allow the wrong thoughts to creep in and before you know it you’ve shanked your shot into a water hazard.
You Become What You Think
In golf and in sales, you cannot afford the luxury of a negative thought.
Self-talk is crazy powerful. You become what you think. When you expect to win, you’ll win far more often than the person who believes they are going to lose. When you learn how to block out negative thoughts and inputs and remain focused on your process you’ll consistently out perform those who don’t.
Understanding this is crucial in these crazy times full of volatility, uncertainty, negativity and divisiveness. In this environment where everything can hit the fan in an instant on any given day, it is super easy to become mired in stinking thinking.
Beware of Stinking Thinking
Stinking thinking is the toxic inner soundtrack that loops in your head after a bad conversation with your boss, seeing a negative story on the news or social media, a lost deal, a bad quarter, or hitting five straight voicemails on cold calls. It’s every “Nobody answers the phone anymore,” “No one’s buying in this economy,” or “I’m just not cut out for sales.”line you feed yourself. It’s catastrophizing. It’s victim-talk.
Imagine the impact on your mindset when your internal conversation is constantly filled with negativity. It’s the mental equivalent of leaving a half-eaten tuna sandwich in your backpack for a week—eventually the smell becomes unbearable.
Mindset drives attitude, attitude drives behavior, and behavior drives outcomes. When stinking thinking settles in:
Your Reticular Activating System—the brain’s spam filter—starts looking for evidence you’re doomed, and sure enough, you find it.
Call reluctance skyrockets. You protect your fragile ego instead of filling the pipe and asking confidently for the sale.
Every “maybe” sounds like a “no,” every objection feels personal, and every tiny setback reinforces the lie that you’re stuck.
Left unchecked, that negative monologue becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Your pipeline shrinks, numbers dip, confidence tanks, and pretty soon you’re blaming the market instead of owning the mirror.
Thoughts are Just Choices
The good news is that thoughts are just choices. You control your mindset. You have the ability to flip the switch from victim to driver. From rain barrel to rainmaker.
What you must never forget is that momentum follows mindset, not the other way around. Manage your self-talk and the results follow suit.
When your self-talk turns negative, take control and change it. Learn to replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations and statements. Get in the habit of looking in the mirror and answering the question: “What can I control right now?” Focus on that.
Knowing vs Doing
Now, here’s the rub, everybody knows self-talk matters. Socrates hammered on it. Marcus Aurelius journaled about it. Your grandmother probably told you to “stop being so negative.” The concept of mental discipline isn’t new, it’s universal.
But intellectual agreement and day-to-day execution are two very different zip codes. You can post quotes from every Stoic on LinkedIn and still spend the morning telling yourself, “I’ll never hit quota in this economy.” Knowledge without application is just trivia.
So flip the switch from knowing to doing.
