Relationship Advice Are You Enabling Or Helping? And What's The Difference?
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Dec 15, 2025 This discussion dives into the crucial distinction between caring for someone and caretaking, revealing how the latter can lead to resentment and dependency. The hosts share insights on enabling behaviors and emotional discomfort, offering practical scripts to support loved ones without taking control. They emphasize the importance of interdependence and healthy boundaries, exploring how reassurance can sometimes hinder growth. With relatable examples and role-plays, they provide tools for fostering genuine connection while avoiding the pitfalls of caretaking.
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Caring Versus Caretaking Defined
- Caretaking is doing for someone what they could do themselves and protecting them from discomfort.
- Caring is being with someone in their pain without removing the experience for them.
Texting Instead Of Comfort
- Colter describes texting his sister to handle Thanksgiving conflict and his wife felt unheard.
- The vignette shows how taking action can bypass the other person's request for comfort and leave relational tension.
Avoidance Drives Caretaking
- People caretaking often do it to avoid discomfort or fear of negative outcomes.
- That avoidance can unintentionally create codependency and prevent growth.