612: Lawrence Yeo - Dissolving Envy, Practicing Curiosity, Writing to Think, Establishing Values, Building Confidence, Being Ambitious, Moving People to Tears, & The Power of Consistency
Dec 9, 2024
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Lawrence Yeo, a storytelling teacher and founder of MoreToThat.com, discusses the profound impact of self-examination on envy, emphasizing that deeper self-awareness can dissolve feelings of comparison. He highlights curiosity as essential for growth and connection, pointing out its role in nurturing relationships. Yeo advocates for defining personal values through journaling and reflects on the dual nature of ambition, urging a balance between drive and humility. His insights on storytelling reveal how it fosters genuine emotional connections.
Self-examination reduces envy by helping individuals understand their worth independently of external comparisons to others.
Curiosity is vital for enriching relationships, as it encourages deeper questions and fosters emotional connections with loved ones.
Establishing core values provides a guiding framework for decision-making, fostering authenticity and resilience against external pressures in life.
Deep dives
The Role of Confidence in Personal Growth
Confidence often stems from experiences of insecurity and doubt, highlighting that growth arises from confronting challenges. Recognizing moments of vulnerability allows individuals to understand their journey towards self-assurance. This journey entails acknowledging past insecurities and using them as learning opportunities to foster personal development. The cultivation of confidence is not merely about positive affirmations but involves a commitment to trusting one’s inner compass despite external pressures.
Exploring Ambition and Its Limits
Ambition plays a crucial role in personal growth, serving as a catalyst for recognizing one's potential and developing humility. It pushes individuals to set higher goals, which provides a continuous path for self-improvement. However, the downside occurs when ambition turns into greed, leading to an excessive focus on external rewards rather than personal fulfillment. Striking a balance between ambition and self-awareness is essential to prevent the deterioration of one’s mental well-being.
Curiosity as a Pathway to Understanding
Curiosity acts as a gateway to deeper insights and appreciation of the human experience. Embracing curiosity encourages individuals to ask questions and seek understanding in their interactions, particularly with loved ones. This practice reveals that relationships thrive on mutual curiosity and emotional depth, contrasting with the common tendency to take close relationships for granted. Ultimately, fostering curiosity allows for meaningful conversations that enrich connections and personal growth.
The Importance of Self-Examination to Combat Envy
Self-examination is a powerful tool against envy, decreasing feelings of inadequacy by fostering an understanding of one’s true self. When individuals take the time to question their motivations and desires, they begin to recognize that envy often arises from external comparisons. This inward reflection helps diminish the impact that others have on one’s self-worth, enabling a more genuine appreciation for personal achievements. Focusing on one’s own journey cultivates self-confidence and diminishes the longing for validation from others.
Defining Values for Meaningful Life Choices
Establishing core values is essential for navigating life’s complexities and aligning personal actions with one’s beliefs. These values serve as guiding principles that influence decision-making and foster authenticity in interpersonal relationships. Engaging in daily reflection and journaling helps individuals uncover their values and understand the motivations behind their choices. When anchored in a strong set of values, individuals are more resilient against external pressures and can maintain integrity in their actions.
Go to www.LearningLeader.com for full show notes and to listen to all episodes of The Learning Leader Show with Ryan Hawk
Lawrence Yeo is a storytelling teacher and the founder and writer at MoreToThat.com. He writes stories about the nuances of the human condition. He’s become one of my favorite writers over the past few years and regularly makes me rethink what I believe.
Notes
Envy: Envy is inversely correlated with self-examination. The less you know yourself, the more you look to others to get an idea of your worth. But the more you delve into who you are, the less you seek from others, and the dissolution of envy begins.
Curiosity is gratitude for the unknown – “The key to cultivating curiosity is to have a healthy relationship with uncertainty.”
Lawrence is called the L.S.E. by his wife. The Life Story Extractor.
Ask More Questions to Those You Love - It’s quite shocking how few questions you ask when you’re with people you’re comfortable with. If you’re no longer curious to know about the person in front of you (friend, wife, parent), then that relationship is devoid of life.
Your Values: Your values are as unique as your genes because no one shares the exact set of experiences and insights that were required to form them. They are the fingerprints of your being, and they are the invisible forces that guide everything you touch. Integrity is the ability to navigate the outer world without discounting your inner values. There is an anchor of authenticity that you’re unwilling to budge, no matter how fervently people want you to.”
Confidence is a commitment to trusting your inner compass, despite how strong the outer winds are. If you do the work to know yourself, then you’ll realize that no external voice can convey the inner complexities you embody. And through that awareness, you’ll reliably choose your intuition above all else.
The Problem with Following Your Passion - Ultimately, you can’t live off your love for something. It doesn’t matter how powerful your inner engine of expression is; without the fuel of money, you will stall out and be left on the side of the road. And like it or not, the only way for this fuel to be provided to you is to create something valuable enough to warrant that exchange.
Ambition - Ambition is critical to the development of a healthy mind. Not only does it allow you to know who you truly are, but it also acts as a gateway to humility. Since ambition is about putting the bar ahead of you, you’ll understand your shortcomings in a visceral way."
Ambition breeds humility. Always setting the bar ahead of where you are. "I'm not quite there yet."
“This email brought me to tears.” -"Hi Lawrence, I just came across your site and love what I am reading. Great insights and reflects a lot of my thoughts lately, like the last 20 years. I'm 72, stage four cancer, and the happiest I've ever been because I have the luxury of being able to examine my life. Best self-help ever. I'm looking forward to reading more of your writing."
Writing:
2 types of writing:
Writing to think.
Writing to present.
Journal vs. Diary. Journal is asking why you feel the way you do. A diary is a catalog of what happened.
Have a job that acts as a patron for your creative work.