Better Sex 240: Making and Keeping Agreements with Martha Kauppi
In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes back guest Martha Kauppi for a vibrant discussion on the art of making and keeping agreements in relationships. They explore the importance of having explicit conversations to establish trust and understanding between partners. Topics include identifying when and what types of agreements should be made, the significance of revisiting and renegotiating agreements, and developing the skills needed to navigate these discussions constructively. The episode also delves into distinctive challenges faced by both monogamous and polyamorous couples, providing insights into maintaining integrity and trust. Listeners are guided on how to uphold agreements effectively and the potential pitfalls of inadequate or overly detailed agreements.
00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast
00:51 The Importance of Agreements in Relationships
03:29 Common Areas Requiring Agreements
07:20 Revisiting and Keeping Agreements
11:15 The Skills for Making Good Agreements
22:31 Trust Building Through Transparent Agreements
24:10 Mid-Episode Break: Resources for Desire Discrepancy
25:04 Revisiting Agreements: The Importance of Flexibility
25:13 Experimentation in Agreement Making
26:27 The Collaborative Nature of Agreements
26:54 Understanding Your Partner's Needs
28:32 Building Trust Through Hard Conversations
30:14 Monogamous vs. Polyamorous Agreements
33:17 Avoiding Pitfalls in Agreement Making
39:17 The Consequences of Breaking Agreements
40:50 When Agreements Become Deal Breakers
48:35 Resources for Better Relationships
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Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast
Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast
Bio:
Martha Kauppi is a marriage and family therapist, educator, author, speaker, and AASECT-certified sex therapist and supervisor. She has a lifelong career in health and sexuality, and is a senior trainer of the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy. Martha trains therapists all over the world to work more effectively with relational intimacy challenges and sex issues. She is the author of Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients).
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More info and resources:
Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast
Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast
How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com
The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com
The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com
Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com
Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass