To Critique Purity Culture (#22)

Seattle's own Dr. Tina Shermer Sellers (psychologist and sex therapist) joins Dan for a fascinating conversation about what is known as Purity Culture, that near-ubiquitous set of sexual-moral claims and practices that ruled the Evangelical zeitgeist in the 80s, 90s and 00s, and is still today probably the default sexual understanding of most American Protestants. But is that understanding Biblical? Does it accord well with what we are learning through science? Why did it come to such prominence? Does having premarital sex really take away "a piece of you" every time you do it, and what's with the double standards for boys and girls? We get into it all, including a bunch of interesting listener questions.Later, Dan answers a patron question: "What is the Gospel, and how do you evangelize?" (1:30:00)SEXUAL SHAME is a visceral feeling of humiliation and disgust toward one's own body and identity as a sexual being and a belief of being abnormal inferior and unworthy. This feeling can be internalized but also manifests in interpersonal relationships having a negative impact on trust communication and physical and emotional intimacy sexual shame develops across the lifespan in interactions with interpersonal relationships one's culture and society and subsequent critical self appraisal. there is also a fear and uncertainty related to one's power or right to make decisions including safety decisions related to sexual encounters along with an internalized judgment toward one's own sexual desire.Vow of Onah: http://tinaschermersellers.com/2011/02/12/the-vow-of-onah-and-other-jewish-attitudes-about-sex/Bible For Normal People purity culture episode: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-82-linda-kay-klein-breaking-free-from-purity/id1215420422?i=1000434395466Sex, Mom and God: https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/sex-mom-and-god-how-the-bibles-strange-take-on-sex-led-to-crazy-politics--and-how-i-learned-to-love-women-and-jesus-anyway_frank-schaeffer/369821/#isbn=0306819287&idiq=4395577Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape: https://www.amazon.com/Girls-Sex-Navigating-Complicated-Landscape/dp/006220974480% of abstinence-only curricula contain serious erroneous information: https://rockthrower.blogs.com/rockthrower/files/20041201102153-50247.pdfhttp://tinaschermersellers.com/Thankgodforsex.orgNwioi.com - Northwest Institute on IntimacyInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/drtinashamelesssex/Twitter: @tinassellersEdited by Scott CangemiJoin the Patreon for bonus episodes (and more) every month: patreon.com/dankochYHP Patron-only FB group: https://tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98Website: youhavepermissionpod.comJoin Dan's email list: dankochwords.comArtwork by http://sprungle.co/

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