No More Desire ™ Porn Addiction Recovery 125: Why You Can’t Stay Hard: Porn, Performance Anxiety & Rewiring Your Brain | Reclaim Confidence, Sexual Presence, and Real Intimacy
"Why can’t I stay hard?"
It’s one of the most painful, confusing, and silent questions men carry — and one that too many men are afraid to ask out loud.
If you’ve ever lost your erection during sex, if you’ve ever felt performance anxiety take over your body, if you can get aroused with porn but struggle with a real partner, or if you’ve wondered whether porn addiction has rewired your brain and damaged your ability to connect —
This episode is for you.
In today’s conversation, I sit down with Shay Doran, a men’s coach who specializes in helping men overcome erectile dysfunction, sexual performance anxiety, and porn-related arousal issues. Shay has lived this struggle himself — and now helps men all over the world rebuild confidence, presence, and intimacy from the inside out.
This is not a surface-level conversation.
We go deep into the psychology of performance anxiety, the neuroscience of arousal, and the emotional patterns that keep men stuck in shame, overthinking, and disconnection.
We talk about why erectile dysfunction in young men is becoming more common, why pills often fail to fix the real problem, and how porn conditioning quietly trains the brain away from real intimacy.
But most importantly, we talk about how to heal.
We talk honestly about masculinity, self-esteem, and how many men use porn as a way to prove to themselves that they’re “still okay” — even while it slowly deepens the disconnection they’re trying to escape.
If you’ve ever thought, “What’s wrong with me?”, if you’ve felt broken, ashamed, or afraid, this issue will ruin your relationship, and if you want real answers instead of generic advice
This episode will meet you right where you are.
You’re not broken, your body isn’t failing you, and this struggle doesn’t define your worth as a man.
It’s a signal — and it can be healed.
Check out Shay's Youtube at: https://www.youtube.com/@shay-doran
Interested in taking Shays Performance Anxiety Quiz? : https://shay-doran.com/free-quiz/
If you’re looking for deeper support and real connection in recovery, I’m opening the No More Desire Brotherhood on January 15th. The pre-launch is open right now, and when you join you’ll get free lifetime access to my 4 Pillars of Recovery mini-course, plus exclusive pre-launch bonuses. You can learn more and join here: https://www.nomoredesire.com/prelaunch
Grab my Free eBook and Free Workshop for more strategies to overcome porn addiction, rewire your brain, and rebuild your life.