Let's Talk Family Enterprise

71: Parenting Adult Children in Family Business

Sep 30, 2025
In this enlightening conversation, Alyson Schafer, an esteemed Adlerian family counsellor and author, shares her insights on parenting in family businesses. She delves into the distinction between fairness and equality, explaining how these concepts shape family dynamics. Alyson discusses the impact of sibling differentiation on functioning roles and highlights the importance of personal responsibility. She also offers strategies for nurturing strengths without comparison, fostering effective co-leadership among siblings, and navigating tensions between family and business.
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INSIGHT

Fair Vs Equal Shapes Family Culture

  • The fair vs equal mindset shapes whether a family uses an abundance or scarcity model.
  • Measuring everything by comparison breeds lifelong sibling competition that spills into business.
ADVICE

Shift From Past Grievances To Future Rules

  • Hear each other's childhood perspectives but focus conversations on creating a future family system.
  • Separate family meetings from business meetings and hire a mediator if you cannot stay constructive.
INSIGHT

Home Tensions Become Workplace Tensions

  • Family tensions that exist at home will follow people into a family business workplace.
  • Living and working inside the same family system demands explicit strategies to manage overlap.
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