Healing Relationships Across Divides (with Dr. Bill Doherty) | E477

What do you do when someone you love sees the world so differently from you that every conversation feels tense? When your values and beliefs clash so deeply that you start wondering if you can stay close at all?

If you’ve ever found yourself in that tension, between wanting to stay connected and wanting to stay true to yourself, you are not alone. In this episode, I’m talking with Dr. Bill Doherty, a professor, therapist, and co-founder of Braver Angels, about how to navigate hard conversations when politics, cultural influences, or deeply held beliefs divide us.

Dr. Doherty shares how the same tools that heal intimate relationships can also strengthen our political communication, especially with the people we care about most. We talk about emotional self-regulation, listening with genuine curiosity, and the courage it takes to connect before you correct. You’ll hear how story and empathy can shift defensiveness into understanding, and how choosing calm over control can keep love alive across even the deepest divides.

Episode Breakdown:
00:00 Introduction with Dr. Bill Doherty and Braver Angels
02:16 The Origin of Braver Angels Workshops
10:30 Affective Polarization and Its Impact on Relationships
16:07 Media, Social Media, and the Angertainment Industry
21:46 Emotional Regulation and Communication Strategies
30:39 Choosing Whether to Engage or Step Back
32:05 Connect Before You Disagree
37:13 Using “I” Statements and Sharing Personal Stories
42:29 The Stories Behind Our Beliefs
50:21 You Can’t Fight Someone the Same Way When You Know Their Heart

Take a moment with me: who in your life do you find hard to talk to about what really matters? What might happen if you stopped trying to convince them and started listening for the experiences that shaped their beliefs? How might that change the way you show up in those moments?

If listening today brought up memories of your own hard conversations, especially that ache of wanting to stay close when your differences feel impossible, I have something that can help. My Communication That Connects Free Masterclass is designed to help you move past power struggles and into real understanding. Inside, I’ll walk you through the exact skills that turn tense moments into opportunities for empathy and connection. You’ll learn how to calm reactivity, communicate from the heart, and create emotionally safe conversations - the kind that honor both your truth and your relationship.

If this episode got you thinking (or feeling) about your own relationships, come hang out with me on Instagram, Facebook, or YouTube. I’m there every week sharing new insights, tools, and little reminders to help you stay grounded and connected - even when life gets messy! And if something from today’s conversation sparked a question or story you want to share, I’d love to hear from you. Let’s keep this conversation going.

xoxo,
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Growing Self