Sexual fantasies are fascinating! There is so much diversity and variability in the way we envision these scenarios, so let’s talk about it. Today, we’re going to dive into some of the interesting details of our fantasy worlds, including where they take place, the perspective from which we see things, and the storylines they follow.
My guest is Mariëlle de Goede, a psychologist and researcher from Amsterdam. From 2018 to 2021, she and her colleagues at Company New Heroes conducted the largest ever study of sexual fantasies in the Netherlands and Belgium as part of a creative project titled Yes, Please! They interviewed over 400 people about their fantasies and subsequently published a Dutch-language book about their findings under the same name.
Some of the topics we discuss in this episode include:
- What questions should you ask when interviewing people about their sexual fantasies?
- Beyond vision, what role do the other senses (smell, taste, sound, touch) play in sexual fantasies?
- Where do people usually fantasize about having sex? How important is the setting in our fantasies?
- Do we usually appear in our own fantasies and, if so, how do we tend to represent ourselves?
- Do people tend to see their fantasies from a first-person POV perspective, or from a third-person perspective (i.e., like they’re watching a movie)?
- Do fantasies usually have a distinct storyline with a beginning, middle, and end?
Head over to Company New Heroes’ website and Instagram page to learn more. You can also check out the Instagram and website for Yes, Please! Additionally, Mariëlle’s book can be found on the publisher’s website and on Amazon.
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Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
