The Messy Truth About How To Trust Yourself & The Universe

Today I’m talking about how to trust yourself and the Universe. This has been one of my biggest lfie challenges, but I’ve got some simple tips that really work in this episode.

Lessons in Trust

Many lessons about trust have come to me through business. Back in 2010, I partnered with Cathy, another dating coach, to host a summit about love—a marketing method that was just starting to catch on.

At first, working together felt easy. I handled speakers and web design, she handled promotion. Then, during a check-in meeting, she announced her coach told her she didn’t need me anymore. She still wanted to finish the event, but she’d be taking it from there to continue the next year.

I was devastated. I had trusted her, and suddenly she was going to take my work. I told her she could do her own event and didn’t give her access to the site I’d built. When we hung up, I was literally shaking.

Even though it was August, hot and humid, I went to the beach with my husband to calm down. As we walked, I kept running it over again in my mind. Paul wanted to leave but I needed to walk a bit more. Then, 50 feet ahead I saw scratched into the sand in big 5″ letters: TRUST.

I froze. Who wrote that? Trust what? Trust who? My husband said, “Trust yourself.” Not exactly the message I wanted, but the truth was there. I couldn’t trust Cathy, but I could trust myself enough to walk away.

Going Deeper

There was a deeper lesson too. Trust isn’t blind faith or ignoring red flags. It’s really about discernment. Cathy showed me who she was. The real question became, did I trust myself to act on this new information? I sure did. Walking away from her wasn’t what I wanted, but it was the only thing to do.

You can’t expect everyone to do right by you. Yet, you don’t want to distrust everyone blindly either. When you trust yourself, you’ll stay open while knowing you’ll handle things if they go awry.

The Universe often teaches lessons through other people and relationships. Sometimes it comes in the form of disappointment or betrayal, while other times through support and friendship. Learn to trust yourself to respond appropriately when someone shows you who they are.

Over the years, I’ve learned to trust my gut. I feel the truth in my body. Often it shows up as something hard I know I have to do, but wish I didn’t.

So let’s talk about trust—trusting yourself, the Universe, and that whole magical dance between the two.

What Does “Trust the Universe” Mean?

Trusting the Universe isn’t about astrology or seeing signs or manifesting. It’s about believing life isn’t out to get you, and that you are supported, even when all hell breaks loose.

When you surrender to the Universe, It’s not giving up. It’s letting go of needing to control the details or the outcome. Next time something goes wrong, pause and say, “I trust this will work out, even if I don’t know how.” Notice the shift.

To work on trusting the Universe, remember that you have a team of helpers in spirit including spirit guides, angels, and ancestors who all watch out for you.

You can also do things like pick an oracle card, pay attention to synchronicities and jot them down, and celebrate the hunches and signs you notice.

To trust yourself, think of this like buidling a muscle. You exercise and work it to strengthen it. You might read Gabby Bernstein’s book The Universe Has Your Back to get some insights and inspiration.

Trust Yourself

Now flip the mirror to look within. To trust yourself means knowing you can survive mistakes, make better choices, and be more resilient. Without self-trust, even the Universe can’t guide you.

Every promise you keep to yourself, even tiny ones, reinforces that at least you’ve got your own back. Instead of thinking of mistakes as failures, consider them to be your teachers. Growth is messy but it proves you’re evolving.

Practice: Before your next decision, ask yourself, “If I trusted myself completely, what would I do?” Let your gut answer, not your doubts or ego.

Here’s a story about how much I trust myself. A couple of years ago, I quit a job right before I started. The man in charge had hired 50 coaches, and something felt off. I had an inner conversation with him, intuitively, and got the same strange answer twice. Intuitively, I heard him say, “Not my problem.”

Because I trusted my inner wisdom, I walked away, even after three interviews and training. Eighteen months later, reviews confirmed my knowing –  they didn’t get paid. Trusting myself saved me from working for free. I do admit that I’m still working on trusting the Universe

Cultivating Trust

Let’s get practical. Here are ways to build trust daily:

Pause, Breathe, Repeat: When fear hits, ask, “What if everything worked out for my highest good?”

Track Evidence: Write down times life surprised you or you overcame something hard. Use it as proof the Universe has your back.

Take Imperfect Action: Don’t wait until you’re ready. Hit publish, send the message, and start the thing. Trust grows when you lean in.

Universe + Yourself = Magic

When you blend trust in yourself with trust in the universe, life gets lighter. You shift from gripping the steering wheel to co-creating with spirit. Like a surfer, you ride the waves and go with the flow, even if you’re nervous.

What are the benefits of living this way? Less anxiety. More flexibility. Openness in relationships. Even failures become stepping stones toward resilience and wisdom.

Trust Yourself Tricks

1. When fear hits, breathe deeply and say, “The universe is working for me.” Pretend you believe it, even for a minute.
2. Before your next task, whisper, “I trust myself.” Ask, “What would I do if I trusted myself fully?” Let your body answer.
3. Take one small brave action each day and celebrate it.

The Universe is Not a Genie

One word of caution. The universe is not like a genie who will grant your wishes. The reason is sometimes you want things that might not be for your highest good. So, the universe will provide and help you, but the solution might not look exactly as you thought it would.

The best approach is not to be attached to the exact way things work out. What’s for your highest good might not match your precise wishes, but that doesn’t mean things won’t work out well. Let it be enough that things work out and receive the solution with grace as much as possible.

I’m not saying you can’t have what you want. Often you can. Just know that sometimes the best possible solution might look different than you planned.

There are times when not getting what you want is actually a gift. Especially when you look back and see how things might have turned out poorly in the long run.

Trusting yourself is built in micro-moments and big leaps, through laughter and lessons. It can be messy, it can be fun, but it always pays off.

So, trust yourself, keep showing up, and keep laughing when life goes sideways. The Universe and your soul have your back more than you imagine.

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