Maiden Mother Matriarch with Louise Perry The Experiences of Trans Widows - Ute Heggen & Emma Thomas | Maiden Mother Matriarch Episode 160
Aug 31, 2025
Ute Heggen, a trans widow and author of 'In the Curated Woods,' along with Emma Thomas, founder of Children of Transitioners, join the conversation. They discuss the emotional and social challenges faced by trans widows, emphasizing the need for awareness and support. Ute shares her personal journey through her partner's transition, while Emma sheds light on the impact on children in these families. They explore complex topics like autogynephilia, financial abuse, and highlight the importance of community as they navigate their unique experiences.
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College Encounter With A Cross‑Dresser
- Ute Heggen first encountered a cross-dressing pianist named David in college who began wearing dresses and makeup publicly.
- She supported him privately but watched him lose his accompanist job and face public confusion in 1979 Milwaukee.
Childhood Revelation Of Father's Transition
- Emma Thomas was between nine and eleven when her father first announced he was a transsexual and the family felt marked as odd.
- She remembers neighbors' unease and being locked in a bedroom while her father cross-dressed.
Discovering Hidden Cross‑Dressing Diaries
- Ute discovered her husband's large sketchbooks of cross-dressing diaries when their children were one and four, while she was breastfeeding.
- She describes shock, defensiveness from him, and a growing sense of gaslighting and narcissistic behavior.
