When Motherhood Unmasks Neurodiversity (ADHD and Autism)

More and more women are getting diagnosed with ADHD later in life, often after becoming parents, and it’s not because ADHD is “trending.” It’s because we’ve missed it for decades.

In this conversation, I talk with psychiatrist and author Dr. Sasha Hamdani about why ADHD in girls and women often goes unnoticed, how hormones and motherhood reveal hidden symptoms, and why self-understanding can be so freeing. We discuss stigma, emotional regulation, anxiety, and how parenting can bring clarity to our own neurodiversity.

If you’ve ever wondered why things got harder after kids, or why your child’s diagnosis suddenly made your own life make more sense, this episode will feel like a deep exhale.

We discuss:

• Why ADHD in girls and women often gets overlooked

• How hormonal shifts during puberty, postpartum, and perimenopause can unmask ADHD

• The difference between anxiety-driven distraction and true ADHD

• How parenting adds new executive function challenges that make symptoms more visible

• The role of emotional regulation in ADHD—and why it’s missing from the diagnostic criteria

• How a late diagnosis can change the way you see yourself and parent your kids

To connect with Dr. Sasha Hamdani follow her on Instagram @thepsychdoctormd and

 check out all her resources at https://www.drhamdanimd.com/.

00:00 - Intro 01:55 - Meet Dr. Sasha Hamdani: psychiatrist, ADHD specialist, and creator 04:00 - Rediscovering ADHD during medical school 06:00 - From burnout to advocacy: how social media changed her work 06:45 - Getting diagnosed as an adult woman and the emotions that followed 10:30 - How ADHD was misunderstood in the 90s—and still is for many girls 12:00 - Why diagnoses often appear after motherhood and hormonal shifts 16:30 - Parenting stress, executive function overload, and ADHD symptoms 18:20 - How girls are taught to mask and why that delays diagnosis 22:00 - ADHD, anxiety, and the “chicken or egg” challenge 27:00 - How self-understanding reshapes parenting and connection 35:15 - Why “superpower” isn’t the right framing—but awareness is powerful 41:20 - The missing piece: emotional regulation in ADHD and Sasha’s upcoming book 47:16 - Dr. Mona’s reflections on self-awareness, parenting, and compassion

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