The Art of Charm 754: Steven Hayes on Why Craving Pain is Human
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is one of the most effective methods to increase psychological flexibility - but what exactly is ACT, how can it decrease the suffering in your life, and why is it so crucial to leading a happy and fulfilling life, especially in this day and age?
What to Listen For
- What is the bus driver metaphor and how can you use it to prevent your thoughts and feelings from controlling you?
- What is ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) and why is it so effective?
- What one question can you ask yourself to determine why something is important to you?
- Why is it important to us to experience the full range of emotions, rather than just the good ones?
- How can you learn to appreciate negative feelings just as much as positive ones so you can decrease the suffering in your life?
- What can you do to turn negative feelings (like anxiety) into a guiding compass for what you want in life?
- What has been the biggest challenge with the way our lives have been infused with technology and what can you do to lessen the negative impacts?
- How dominant is the comparison of more versus less in our heads?
- What is the best way to start overcoming your anxiety, and why might it seem counterintuitive at first?
- What simple exercise can you do to transform your mental state whenever you want?
Pain is unavoidable. One could argue it is the most important stimulus for change and growth in a person’s life. And if pain is that important, then having a mindset or method for dealing with pain can only benefit you in the long run. If you allow yourself to get hung up on painful moments and refuse to learn from them, then you will only increase the suffering you experience.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy helps individuals to shift their perspective on pain and suffering by improving their psychological flexibility. Think of it as a tree in a storm. If that tree is stiff, it will eventually snap under enough stress, but if the tree is flexible, no matter how hard the wind blows, the tree will simply bend until the storm has passed.
Do you want to snap under the stress of life? Or do you want to bend, and come out the other side stronger and wiser?
A Word From Our Sponsors
Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here!
Babbel is the new way to learn a foreign language.You can try Babbel for free. Download the app or text CHARM to 484848.
Access a World of Knowledge. Unlimited video learning with the World's Greatest Professors at The Great Courses Plus. Start your Free Month trial now by going to thegreatcoursesplus.com/charm
Go to stateandliberty.com and type in the code CHARM to get 10% off your first order or mention this podcast at any of their locations.
Blinkist gives you access to key insights from 2,500+ bestselling nonfiction books, transformed into powerful packs you can read or listen to in just 15 minutes. Go to blinkist.com/aoc to start your FREE trial or get 3 months off your yearly plan.
Resources from this Episode
Episode 729: Self-esteem is Bullshit
Episode 727: Sugar Ray Leonard
Mental Brakes to Avoid Mental Breaks | Steven Hayes | TEDx
How love turns pain into purpose | Steven Hayes | TEDx
Check in with AJ and Johnny!
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices