Happier with Gretchen Rubin A Little Happier: A Story from Real Life: Sometimes, We Help Best by Hanging Back
Oct 27, 2025
Sometimes, our impulse to help can actually hinder others. A personal story reveals how well-meaning gestures, like pulling someone up too quickly, can interfere with their recovery. Instead, it's often more effective to simply sit beside someone and ask them what they really need. This approach fosters genuine support and understanding during challenging times. Finally, advice for navigating life's transitions encourages reflection and gaining perspective on what truly matters.
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Fainting At A Black‑Tie Gala
- Gretchen Rubin fainted at a black-tie gala due to an unexpected vasovagal response.
- Well-meaning guests repeatedly pulled her upright, which worsened her condition because her body needed to be prone to restore blood flow to her brain.
How A Vasovagal Response Works
- A vasovagal response drops blood pressure and reduces blood flow to the brain, causing fainting.
- Interfering with the body's response (for example, pulling someone upright) can make the episode worse.
Ask Before You Act When Helping
- Ask a person in distress what they are feeling and what they need before acting.
- Sit beside them, listen, and offer to let them take their time while you provide support.