Her Best Self: Freedom from Disordered Eating, Body Obsession & Perfectionism EP 232: The Small Life Your ED Wants vs. The Abundant Life You Deserve ~ Here's How You Settle for More
Are you tired of living small? Of missing out on life because your mind is consumed with food thoughts, calorie calculations, and body obsession? In this expansion-focused episode, Lindsey paints a vivid picture of what your life looks like when you stop settling for the crumbs of existence and start feasting on the fullness of freedom. If you've been thinking this eating disorder life is just "how things are" for you, prepare to have your world expanded as Lindsey shows you what abundant recovery actually looks like.
Key Takeaways- You've been settling for surviving when you were made for thriving
- When you focus on less, you get more of less; when you focus on more, you get more
- Sometimes you have to make peace with what is to grab onto what's waiting
- The abundant life is waiting for you on the other side of food thoughts
- "So what?" is the question that changes everything about weight gain fears
- Saying no to dinner with friends because you can't control the menu
- Missing conversations because you're calculating calories in your head
- Choosing the gym over your daughter's soccer game because you "have to" work out
- Canceling date nights because restaurants feel too scary
- Living in sweatpants because nothing else feels "safe"
- Spending vacations obsessing over food instead of making memories
More Presence:
- Actually being THERE at dinner instead of calculating what everyone's eating
- Laughing at husband's jokes and listening to boys' stories
- Present in your own life instead of held hostage by food thoughts
More Energy:
- Not exhausted from mental gymnastics of restriction and over-exercise
- Energy to play with kids and show up fully in business
- Living FOR something instead of managing against something
More Purpose:
- When your brain isn't consumed 24/7, you discover what you're passionate about
- Remembering what brings you joy beyond food and body control
More Authentic Relationships:
- Ordering what you actually want at dinner
- Traveling without packing your entire kitchen
- Being fully present because you're not monitoring every bite
From Scarcity to Abundance Thinking:
- ED Focus: Less food, less calories, less space, less needs
- Recovery Focus: More nourishment, more rest, more joy, more presence
- Maya Angelou Quote: "If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."
The Weight Gain Terror + The "So What?" Breakthrough:
- What are you really afraid of if you gain weight?
- "So what if you gain weight? So what if people have opinions?"
- "I'd rather be 20 pounds heavier and present at my son's birthday party than be the 'perfect' weight and miss the joy"
- "I'd rather wear a size 8 and go on adventures than fit in tiny clothes and live a tiny life"
1. Expand Your Food Choices
- Instead of: "I can only eat these 5 safe foods"
- Expansion: "I'm exploring what my body actually craves and enjoys"
2. Expand Your Social Life
- Instead of: "I can't go out to eat because I won't know the calories"
- Expansion: "I'm choosing connection over control"
3. Expand Your Self-Talk
- Instead of: "I need to exercise to earn this food"
- Expansion: "I'm nourishing my body because I deserve to feel good"
4. Expand Your Identity
- Instead of: "I'm the girl who always orders salad"
- Expansion: "I'm the woman who chooses what sounds good to her"
- "That's not living. That's surviving."
- "Sometimes we have to make peace with what is so that we can grab onto what's waiting for us."
- "When we focus on less, we get more of less. When we focus on more, we get more."
- "So what if you gain weight? I'd rather be 20 pounds heavier and actually present."
- "Your life - your REAL life - is waiting for you on the other side of these food and body thoughts."
- John 10:10: "I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly." - Not restricted, controlled, or conditional life, but ABUNDANT life.
- Change your circumstances (choose recovery, expand your life)
- Change the way you think about your circumstances (reframe fears, focus on abundance)
Step 1: Notice Where You're Playing Small
- Catch yourself choosing the eating disorder option over the life option
- Are you skipping work happy hours? Avoiding family barbecues?
Step 2: Ask "What Would More Look Like?"
- Before automatically choosing restriction, ask:
- "If I were living in abundance instead of scarcity, what would I choose?"
Step 3: Take One Expansion Action Daily
- Order the sandwich instead of the salad
- Say yes to the invitation
- Take the rest day your body is asking for
One year from now:
- Your first thought isn't about food or your body
- You're planning weekend trips excited about adventure, not anxious about restaurants
- You're fully present for every moment because your mind isn't consumed
- You're living in abundance instead of scarcity
- You're tired of living in the corner of your own life
- You're exhausted from the mental chatter consuming your days
- You want to show up fully present for your family and friends
- You're ready to discover who you are beyond food and body thoughts
- You want energy for purpose beyond managing your eating disorder
- They don't just recover - they fall in love with their lives
- They discover energy they forgot they had
- They show up as the women they were always meant to be
- They expand from small, controlled lives into abundant, joyful presence
- Notice every time you choose the ED option over the life option
- Ask "What would more look like?" before making food/social decisions
- Take one expansion action daily (order what sounds good, say yes to plans, rest when needed)
- Apply to work with Lindsey at herbestself.co to make the shift from settling to expanding
If everything in your heart is saying "YES, I want more energy, more presence, more LIFE" - go to www.herbestself.co right now and fill out an application to work with Lindsey.
You can keep trying to figure this out alone, or you can let Lindsey show you exactly how to expand into the abundant life waiting for you.
Your eating disorder wants you to settle for less. But you were made for more.
Connect with Lindsey- Website: www.herbestself.co
- Private Facebook Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com
- Client Applications: www.herbestself.co/services
Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She's lived on both sides of the choice between settling for less and claiming more - and now helps women expand from small, controlled lives into abundant, joyful freedom.
If this episode expanded your vision of what's possible, please share it with someone who needs to stop settling for less. Your support helps more women discover the abundant life waiting beyond their eating disorder.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.