Ep. 26: Toxic Shame: Why was I failing at Shame Resilience?

The good Texas social worker that I was (am???) meant I discovered...and loved...Dr. Brene Brown's work on shame resilience pretty early on.

I loved it.  Finally.  A way out of shame!

Except...then I stopped loving it.  It seemed I couldn't even do shame resilience right because all the things Dr. Brown talked about weren't helping me.

It wasn't that I wasn't doing it right.  It's that there was a missing step.  When I learned about the neurobiology of toxic shame, it began to unlock itself for me, ever so slightly.

The science helped me believe "There is nothing wrong with me."  Once I could believe it with my thinking brain, I could begin to explore feeling it.  Without a doubt, that's much harder!  But I'm not sure I would have ever risked that hard work without first understanding the neurobiology of toxic shame.

Toxic shame is not uncommon for people, including children, who have experience early trauma, abuse, neglect, and loss.  There is a sense of "I am something very wrong" or even "I exist wrong."  It's not true!  And understanding the mechanisms of toxic shame proves it.

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