309 ADHD & Friendship, Part 1: Red Flags, Green Flags, and How to Make Real Connections
Apr 1, 2025
auto_awesome
Navigating adult friendships can be especially tough for those with ADHD. The discussion reveals red and green flags to look for in relationships, helping listeners identify what to avoid and what nurtures genuine connections. Practical strategies are shared to make new friends without feeling overwhelmed, emphasizing the importance of patience and reciprocity. Personal anecdotes illustrate how to create safe, supportive friendships that energize rather than drain. Tune in for insights on building meaningful relationships that you truly deserve.
44:01
AI Summary
AI Chapters
Episode notes
auto_awesome
Podcast summary created with Snipd AI
Quick takeaways
Recognizing red flags in friendships, like constant criticism or boundary issues, is essential for ADHDer well-being and connection.
Building supportive friendships involves intentional actions and patience, focusing on mutual respect and low-pressure interactions to strengthen bonds.
Deep dives
Navigating Mornings with Neurodivergence
Many individuals with ADHD face significant challenges in managing morning routines, often leading to feelings of frustration and burnout. The host shares a personal account of her neurodivergent child who struggles to wake up early for school, highlighting the unfairness of societal expectations designed for neurotypical individuals. This situation raises questions about how to support neurodivergent children in understanding and accepting themselves while teaching them to function in a demanding world. The narrative emphasizes the need for a systematic change regarding early school start times to better accommodate the needs of those with ADHD and other neurodivergent conditions.
Understanding Adult Friendships
Constructing and maintaining friendships can be particularly challenging for adults with ADHD due to a variety of symptoms that hinder social interactions. The podcast explores how symptoms such as inattention, impulsivity, and rejection sensitivity can influence the dynamics of friendships, often leading to misunderstandings or feelings of inadequacy. As individuals with ADHD begin self-development journeys, they may reassess their existing friendships and recognize which are unhealthy or draining. The discussion seeks to validate these experiences while offering strategies for improvement, emphasizing that recognizing and reflecting on these patterns is the first step toward healthier relationships.
Identifying Red and Green Flags in Friendships
The identification of red flags in friendships is crucial for individuals with ADHD to avoid unhealthy relational dynamics. Red flags can include constant criticism, one-sided interactions, a lack of respect for boundaries, and feeling emotionally drained after interactions. Conversely, green flags signify the presence of healthy relationships, characterized by mutual respect, encouragement, and consistency. The podcast encourages listeners to actively look for these green flags in new friendships while reflecting on the qualities they need in encouraging and supportive relationships.
Strategies for Making New Friends
Building a supportive friendship network involves intentional actions such as joining community groups, attending classes, or participating in local events based on shared interests. The podcast suggests starting small with low-pressure interactions, like casual conversations with acquaintances, and gradually deepening those connections. Another essential aspect of friendship development is the willingness to invest time and energy into nurturing relationships, echoing the notion that friendships require effort from all parties involved. The host urges listeners to approach this process with patience and persistence while acknowledging the value of in-person connections alongside online interactions.
Friendship as an adult is hard—and when you have ADHD, it can feel almost impossible. The impulsivity, the overthinking, the struggle to set boundaries or trust your gut... it’s a lot. But you can build strong, supportive friendships—and it starts with knowing what to look for (and what to avoid).
In Part 1 of this two-part series, we’re breaking down:
Why friendships can be uniquely challenging for ADHDers
How to recognize red flags before you waste time on the wrong people
What green flags to look for in a healthy, balanced friendship
How to make new friends as an adult (without it feeling totally overwhelming)
Why it’s important to go slow and avoid the overshare/overinvest spiral
You’ll walk away with a better understanding of what makes relationships feel safe and energizing—and how to stop settling for less than you deserve.
💛 Don’t miss Part 2 next week, where we’ll dive into how to actually GO OUT AND FIND FRIENDS!