HERself

201. Julie Menanno Dives Deep into Attachment Theory and Creating a Secure Relationship

Oct 2, 2023

Therapist Julie Menanno delves into attachment theory and secure relationships, explaining different attachment styles, how couples handle arguments, and why certain partners are drawn to each other. She addresses reactions to disappointment, ways to identify attachment styles, and creating a secure home environment. Julie emphasizes the importance of trust, communication, emotional validation, and self-care in nurturing fulfilling partnerships.

52:20

Episode guests

Julie Menanno

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Episode notes

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Quick takeaways

Understanding attachment theory helps in creating secure and fulfilling relationships based on emotional safety.

Identifying attachment styles allows for better communication and relationship navigation between partners with varying needs.

Handling disappointment in relationships requires effective communication, validation, and understanding of different attachment styles' responses.

Deep dives

Understanding Attachment Styles: Secure vs. Insecure Relationships

Attachment theory emphasizes the importance of feeling safe and valued in relationships. Secure attachment is based on having needs met, leading to a sense of safety and security. Couples need to repair ruptures in communication and meet each other's attachment needs for a healthy relationship. Insecure attachment can lead to unmet needs defining the relationship's climate.

Introduction

5min

Unpacking Attachment Styles in Relationships

13min

Reflections on Social Media Impact and Electrolyte Drink Promotion

2min

Fostering Secure Relationships Through Trust and Communication

15min

Exploring Disappointment and Attachment Styles in Relationships

2min

Navigating Attachment Styles in Relationships

9min

Fostering Emotional Validation and Security in Relationships

6min

Our conversation with Julie Menanno, therapist and mom of six, centers around secure and insecure relationships based on attachment styles. She educates us on what attachment theory is and what the different types of attachment styles are. Julie breaks down what happens when a couple has an argument and how to help get you back to the ultimate goal in any relationship: feeling safe.

Do you wonder what attachment style you and your partner are? Julie walks us through how we can tell and what it means if you don’t identify with one attachment style over the other. She talks about why avoidant and anxious partners are often attracted to each other. Julie also explains why different attachment styles react differently when their partner is disappointed in them.

To conclude our talk with Julie, she gives us an example of what we can start doing today to create a home that has an attachment friendly environment. Doing this type of work is hard but it’s fulfilling. Remember, it’s not linear but it will be worthwhile. If you want to be in your partnership for life, you must figure out how to sustain it and nurture it. When you get to go through something like this with someone you love, you come out the other side feeling like a rockstar!

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Links & Resources:

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