This Is Proof You Have What It Takes

Jan 13, 2020

Insecurities plague us all, especially as we compare ourselves to others on social media. Historical anecdotes, like Julius Caesar's moment before Alexander the Great's statue, highlight this struggle. Instead of fueling our doubts, embracing confidence can lead to better work. Reflecting on Dorothy Day's insights, the true pride comes from the impact we have on our children. The love and accomplishment of fatherhood can overshadow societal measurements of success, offering profound fulfillment and inspiration.

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INSIGHT

Insecurity vs. Confidence

Insecurity is a common human experience, often fueled by comparisons with others' achievements.
However, true success comes from confidence and self-belief, not from craving or feeling inadequate.

ANECDOTE

Caesar's Insecurity

Julius Caesar felt insecure comparing his accomplishments to Alexander the Great's at a similar age.
This anecdote highlights how even great figures struggle with insecurity and comparison.

ADVICE

Parental Pride

Find satisfaction and pride in the people you've created (your children).
This is a source of meaning and accomplishment regardless of other achievements.

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Who among us is not insecure? We look around and see people who make more money. Who have bigger houses. Who have accomplished more than we have. This insecurity is compounded by social media, but it is also timeless. There’s a story that Julius Caesar once stood in front of a statue of Alexander the Great. At the age Caesar was at that moment, Alexander the Great had already conquered the world. By comparison, Caesar had done almost nothing.

While there might be some motivational benefits to this insecurity, it’s probably not the best way to live. And does anyone think they do good work while telling themselves they are not enough? Might fullness and confidence actually be a better place—cognitively, creatively, emotionally—to approach your work and your life from than craving? You don’t make great work feeling like a piece of shit. You make great work knowing you are capable of making great work.

In any case, the Catholic activist—and possibly future saint—Dorothy Day had a good observation that we can think about today as a way of putting some of those insecurities to bed. Because whatever you do, wherever you are in your career and life, there is something you should be taking great satisfaction and meaning in—there is something you should be incredibly proud of yourself for: the person(s) you have created. As she writes:

“If I had written the greatest book, composed the greatest symphony, painted the most beautiful painting or carved the most exquisite figure, I could not have felt the more exalted creator than I did when they placed my child in my arms...No human creature could recieve or contain so vast a flood of love and joy as I felt after the birth of my child. With this came the need to worship, to adore.”

That feeling, that feeling you felt the first day you held your children. The feeling you feel when they run into your arms and call you daddy. Or when they come into your room to ask for advice. Or when you sit across the table from them and watch them eat. That feeling—the pride, the love, the connection—this is the feeling to carry with you.

You made that. You were the exalted creator of that. It might not be a billion dollar tech startup, it might not be a Grammy-winning album or the Mona Lisa, but it’s one hell of a something. And it’s only the beginning.

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