Don't Worry About the Vase Podcast Dating Roundup #9: Signals and Selection
Dec 30, 2025
Explore the quirks of dating, from the perplexing 'ick' to the challenge of spotting red flags. Discover how overly generic expectations can hinder your search for love and why being too picky leads to missed opportunities. Unpack the effects of past partners on attraction and the social costs of ghosting. Learn the importance of clear communication in relationships and why some harmless habits actually matter. Plus, dig into how astrology questions can reveal hidden compatibility signs.
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Small Behaviors Signal Big Traits
- The "ick" is a small behavior taken as Bayesian evidence of deeper character traits.
- If a partner should know X signals Y, doing X implies lack of respect or desire to signal Y.
Don't Penalize Favorable Selection
- Calling ordinary responsible acts (like owning a house) a red flag is often a misclassification.
- Favorable selection means those who reject such signals likely weren't good matches anyway.
Narrow Criteria To What You Value
- Define the few traits you value more than the market and drop generic, high-demand criteria.
- Prioritize attributes that differentiate candidates rather than the universally desirable checklist.