The Dark Psychology Behind Attraction Strategies (and Why They Always Backfire)

As a former player myself, I know first-hand how crushing the “Grandiosity-Shame Cycle” is. Almost all players fall into this psychological trap that only leads to rage, doubt, depression, and despair. 

But you know what? 

It’s not just players who are at risk of falling into this sabotaging cycle. Any one who builds his or her identity around external validation is at risk of falling into this deep emotional hole, where compulsive self-destruction and total emptiness become your new normal. 

To drive home just how devastating the “Grandiosty-Shame Cycle” is, today’s episode looks at a real life example of how this cycle plays out. In today’s show, we’re analyzing the tragic rise and fall of one of the most famous pickup artists in the world, Erik von Markovik, better known as Mystery. 

Mystery’s story shows you just how dangerous the “Grandiosty-Shame Cycle” is, why seeking external validation always results in misery, and how to pull yourself out of this toxic cycle if you show any of the telltale signs. 

Listen now. 

Show Highlights Include:

• A real life example of how being trapped in the “Grandiosity-Shame Cycle” can throw you into a suicidal episode (3:04) 
• The weird reason successful players become obsessive, jealous, and insecure when facing real intimacy (6:54) 
• 2 things every man must do to break out of the “Grandiosity-Shame Cycle” (or it will forever sabotage your relationships) (8:37) 
• How relying on external validation is a fast track to being consumed by rage, doubt, depression, and despair (10:39) 
• Why you’re drawn to romantic partners who reflect your deepest childhood wounds (and how to avoid heartbreak in these relationships) (15:12) 
• The counterintuitive reason narcissistic defenses actually come from deep, unresolved traumas, not arrogance like most people believe (24:22) 

For more about David Tian, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/about/ 

Emotional Mastery is David Tian's step-by-step system to transform, regulate, and control your emotions... so that you can master yourself, your interactions with others, and your relationships... and live a life worth living. Learn more here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/emotionalmastery