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#117 Stop People Pleasing: How To Set Boundaries (And Say No) | Charlamagne Tha God

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Jan 28, 2026

Guest

Charlamagne Tha God

Charlamagne Tha God, radio and media personality known for The Breakfast Club and books on honesty, shares candid frameworks for handling toxic people, setting boundaries, and controlling the frame in tough conversations. He discusses quitting toxic social media, the Rule of 10, building the Black Effect audio network, faith and panic-mantras, and why trade skills matter more than AI hype.

01:22:59

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Episode notes

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INSIGHT

Ask Why Twice

Ask "why" twice to move beyond rehearsed answers and reach the human truth.
The second "why" flips prepared responses into genuine reasoning.

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ANECDOTE

Interviews As Last Conversations

Charlamagne remembers interviewing many figures who later died, so he treats conversations as potentially final.
That mindset made him value depth and truth in every interview.

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ADVICE

Learn To Say No

Practice saying no and set boundaries: this year is about the word "no."
Refuse people-pleasing to preserve energy and focus on what matters.

Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode

Art of the Interview: Ask Why Twice

01:48 • 3min

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Preparation and the Joy of Discovery

05:00 • 1min

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The Weight of Reaching Millions

06:05 • 1min

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Obsession Is the Price of Mastery

07:27 • 1min

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Finding Your Calling vs Chasing Trends

08:40 • 4min

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Greatness, Balance, and Living to Inform Work

12:58 • 3min

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Einstein Time: You Create Your Time

16:27 • 3min

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People-Pleasing, Boundaries, and Saying No

19:24 • 1min

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Rule of 10: You Can't Please Everyone

20:38 • 3min

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On Revenge, 50 Cent, and Antiheroes

23:53 • 5min

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Social Media as Verbal Abuse

29:18 • 11min

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Why Talk to Those You Disagree With

40:43 • 43sec

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Building Black Effect and Audio Value

41:26 • 2min

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Representation: Embrace the Niche

43:35 • 4min

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Money, Motivation, and Financial Literacy

47:26 • 4min

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Faith, Guidance, and Mantras for Panic

Faith, Hard Work, and Critics

57:45 • 6min

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Blue Collar Renaissance: Trades Over Degrees

01:04:11 • 3min

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Ford Family Scholarship and Trade Support

01:07:27 • 4min

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Advice for the Climb: Gratitude and Honesty

01:11:40 • 4min

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What to Watch: Netflix and Publishing

01:15:16 • 5min

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Final Thanks and Closing Thought

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Get Honest or Die Lying

Why Small Talk Sucks

Charlamagne Tha God

Most people think hard conversations are about winning. Charlamagne Tha God knows better - they’re about controlling the frame. After nearly three decades in radio — turning The Breakfast Club into a cultural force and surviving the internet’s loudest pile-ons — he’s learned why some people dominate conversations without being the smartest, loudest, or most liked.

In this no-filter episode, Charlamagne breaks down the exact frameworks he uses to handle toxic people, win high-stakes conversations, and stay grounded while millions are watching. We get into why he asks every question twice (“but why?”), how he stopped people-pleasing and started setting real boundaries, why gratitude beats ambition, and the brutal truth behind the rule of 10 — three people will love you, three will hate you, and the rest don’t care.

This isn’t theory. It’s applied psychology from the trenches. From quitting Twitter before it broke him, to the panic-attack mantra that saved his career, to why blue-collar work matters more than AI hype, to why 50 Cent-level petty can be oddly therapeutic. If difficult people drain you, boundaries feel hard, or you want to communicate with calm confidence in a world that rewards noise — this episode will permanently upgrade how you think, talk, and move.

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00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:17 The Art of the Interview: Why Matters Most 00:06:57 Obsession Is the Price of Greatness 00:12:45 Work-Life Balance and Living Life to Fuel Your Work 00:15:30 Einstein Time: You Create Your Own Time 00:20:08 The Rule of 10: Why You Can't Please Everyone 00:22:53 50 Cent's Level of Petty: The Power of Revenge 00:31:25 Verbally Abusive Relationships With Your Smartphone 00:40:12 The Black Effect Podcast Network: Building Empire 00:45:15 Money Is Not the Root of All Evil: Rewriting Your Money Story 00:51:18 God, Faith, and the Voice That Guides You 01:02:42 Blue Collar Jobs Are the Future: The Trade School Revolution 01:10:29 The Breakfast Club on Netflix and What's Next 01:10:28 Final Words: Gratitude, God, and Keeping It Real

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