DJ Fat Tony, who has experienced abusive relationships and addiction, discusses the power of seeking help, unlearning and re-learning behaviors, and the journey of self-love. They also touch on trauma healing, writing about abuse, ADHD, verbalizing feelings, breaking free from mistreatment, and the significance of commitment and dedication in personal growth.
Compassion towards oneself and others is crucial for healing and self-discovery.
Finding a supportive community and surrounding oneself with the right company greatly aids in sobriety and personal growth.
Deep dives
The Power of Self-Compassion and Healing
In this podcast episode, titled 'I Don't Take Requests,' DJ Fat Tony shares his journey of self-discovery, healing, and sobriety. He discusses how he never loved himself and sought validation from others through money and humor. Writing his memoir and going through trauma therapy helped him confront the deep-rooted shame, trauma, and addiction he experienced. He emphasizes the importance of compassion, both towards oneself and others, and how it plays a vital role in the healing process.
Overcoming Addiction and Changing Mindsets
DJ Fat Tony reflects on his addiction and the journey to sobriety. He explains that going to rehab was important, but individual readiness and commitment were crucial for success. He highlights the importance of finding discipline and making conscious choices to change one's life. Tony shares how he overcame the mentally and physically exhausting battles he faced and found a supportive community that helped him stay on the path of recovery.
The Power of Finding Your People
Throughout the podcast, DJ Fat Tony emphasizes the significance of surrounding oneself with the right company. He discusses the influence of friends and how their support or lack thereof can impact personal growth and recovery. Tony encourages others to find their own support system and distance themselves from negative influences. By finding like-minded individuals and building a supportive network, he believes it becomes easier to maintain discipline and make positive changes.
Transforming Shame into Compassion
DJ Fat Tony shares how he transformed shame into compassion. He discusses the impact of shame on addiction, relationships, and self-worth. Through self-compassion and acceptance, he has learned how to love himself and rebuild his life. Tony encourages others to speak openly about their struggles and seek help, allowing for healing and growth. He believes that by sharing his story and helping others, he can make a positive impact and inspire change.
DJ Fat Tony has spent time actively learning what love is after being in abusive relationships and being an addict. Having done trauma therapy, he’s not only begun to understand what healthy relationships with others look like, but also how it feels to love himself, to have self-worth and self-compassion, and not be forced into silence by shame.
In this chat, Fearne and Tony talk about the power and freedom that comes with saying out loud that you need help, as well as how much of a challenge it is to unlearn and re-learn behaviours.
Tony’s memoir, I Don’t Take Requests, is available now at all major book retailers.
CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains frank chat about child abuse and suicide, so do take care while listening.