Ask Uncut - Ultimatums, 'Too Soon' and How Honest is Too Honest?
Feb 28, 2024
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Topics discussed include navigating relationship needs, ultimatums, and the challenges of transitioning from a situationship to a serious relationship. The hosts also talk about the significance of the leap year, historical traditions of women proposing on Leap Day, and the complexities of expressing honesty in personal relationships.
Greet naturally on the second date without worrying about kisses, focus on being present and enjoying the moment.
Discuss exclusivity openly after five weeks of dating to ensure alignment in expectations and intentions for a healthy relationship.
Exclusivity in a relationship is not time-dependent, prioritize open communication and mutual understanding to establish a committed partnership.
Deep dives
Don't Stress Over Greetings
When meeting the guy for the second date, don't stress over how to greet him. Simply be yourself, offer a warm hug, maybe a peck on the cheek, but avoid the pressure of a lip kiss. Enjoy the moment, let things flow naturally, and focus on being present and having a good time, rather than worrying about the greeting.
Timing for Exclusivity
The timeline for exclusivity in a relationship varies greatly. After five weeks of dating, if you feel the desire to be exclusive, it's a valid feeling. Have an open conversation with your partner to determine if they share the same desire. Be prepared for any response, whether it aligns with your expectations or not, knowing where you both stand is essential for a healthy relationship.
Kissing on Second Date
When considering whether to kiss on the lips or cheek on the second date, follow your instincts and the energy between you and your date. A non-presumptuous cheek kiss or side lip kiss can be a friendly and appropriate way to greet without pressure. Allow the moment to unfold naturally without overthinking it, and focus on enjoying each other's company.
Navigating Exclusivity Conversations
When feeling ready for exclusivity after five weeks of dating, approach the conversation with honesty and clarity. Express your desire for exclusivity and inquire about your partner's perspective openly. Don't shy away from asking important questions to ensure both of your intentions and expectations align. Having the conversation early on can set the tone for the relationship's future.
Setting the Stage for Exclusivity
Exclusivity in a relationship is not time-dependent, but rather hinges on open communication and mutual understanding. If after five weeks you wish to be exclusive, initiate a conversation with your partner about the possibility. Be prepared for any outcome and ensure that both parties are on the same page to establish a healthy and committed relationship.
Determining Exclusivity
The timing for exclusivity in a relationship varies greatly and is unique to each couple. After five weeks of dating, feeling the inclination towards exclusivity is natural. Have an open conversation with your partner to understand their perspective and intentions. Be prepared for any response as clarity and communication are key to navigating a healthy and committed relationship.
I’ve been officially dating someone for about four months, but we were in a bit of a situationship for about 5 months before that and we were friends for about 3 years before that. We have already said ‘I love you’ and talked about the future, so we’re quite serious. The only thing is, after we had been officially dating for a month, he said that the ‘honeymoon phase’ was over and that he needed to start taking a bit more time to himself. It has caused a few issues, because he’s 30 and I’m his first partner, so he’s quite a solitary person, but I need quite a bit of attention. I’m starting to regret deciding to be exclusive, but it’s a bit too late to backtrack from that now. I’m not sure how to handle this situation, because I don’t want to be the nagging girlfriend who asks for more time, but I’m also starting to get resentful about not having more of his time.
A few weeks ago you answered the question to another listener about the girl who’s fiancé was going to propose to her when / after she gets her license. And an engagement under certain conditions, that was okay. My friend is in a similar situation with her boyfriend of 1 year. However, her boyfriend has said openly to her that he wants to marry her, but won’t propose to her until she gives up vaping and drinking on weeknights. I thought personally this could be problematic and potentially manipulative to have a promised engagement under certain conditions. I am dying to hear your take on this.
I feel like this is a stupid question but I have been out of the dating game for so long and I need to know what's normal. I went out on a first date with a guy and it was absolutely amazing. I was lucky enough to get a kiss at the end of the date and nothing else! We are going on a second date next week. Do I kiss him on the lips when I see him next or be polite and give him a kiss on the check?
When is 'too soon' to ask the person you've been going on dates with whether it's exclusive?
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