Bill Eddy - Managing 'High Conflict' Personalities
Sep 27, 2023
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Explore the challenges of managing high conflict personalities with various disorders, including narcissistic and histrionic. Learn about strategies like the CARs method for effective interaction management. Discover the importance of empathy and boundaries in navigating high conflict situations and dealing with workplace harassment. Delve into topics on sociopaths, con artists, personal growth, and practical tips for managing high conflict personalities.
Dealing with high-conflict personalities involves recognizing extreme behaviors and setting firm boundaries.
The CAR method (Connect, Analyze, Respond, Set limits) offers effective strategies for engaging with challenging individuals.
Deep dives
Understanding High-Conflict Personality Types
High-conflict personality types, such as narcissistic, borderline, antisocial, histrionic, and paranoid, present challenges due to enduring dysfunctional interpersonal behaviors. Dealing with these individuals requires recognizing their extreme behaviors, lack of insight, and tendency to project blame onto others. Leaders must navigate through managing disputes and ensuring boundaries are set to mitigate workplace disruptions.
The CAR Method for Managing High-Conflict Individuals
The CAR method, emphasizing Connect, Analyze, Respond, and Set limits, offers strategies for engaging with high-conflict individuals effectively. Connecting through empathetic statements, analyzing options, responding to misinformation gently, and setting boundaries are crucial in managing challenging personalities. These skills enable leaders to navigate conflicts and maintain constructive interactions.
Identifying Telltale Behaviors of High-Conflict Individuals
Recognizing common traits like 100% blame, all-or-nothing thinking, unmanaged emotions, and extreme behaviors can help identify high-conflict personalities. Leaders should be alert to signs of blaming others entirely, exhibiting radical thought patterns, displaying emotional volatility, and engaging in behaviors considered extreme by societal standards.
Navigating High-Conflict Situations with Empathy and Boundaries
In high-conflict situations, prioritizing empathy while setting firm boundaries is essential for effective conflict resolution. Seeking support from colleagues, addressing workplace issues promptly, and practicing empathetic communication can help manage challenges posed by individuals with high-conflict personalities. Combining understanding with assertive boundaries can lead to more constructive outcomes in difficult interactions.
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. developed the high conflict personalitytheory to explain the driving forces behind people who present the most challenging behaviors. He is an expert on managing disputes involving high-conflict situations and 5 high conflict personality types, including a subset of those with narcissistic, borderline, antisocial, histrionic, and paranoid personality disorders. He has trained over 200,000 professionals in 10 countries on understanding and managing high-conflict disputes, including lawyers, judges, mediators, managers, human resource professionals, businesspersons, healthcare administrators, college administrators, law enforcement, therapists, and others.
As an attorney, Bill was a Certified Family Law Specialist in California and the Senior Family Mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center in San Diego. Before becoming an attorney in 1992, he was a Licensed Clinical Social worker with twelve years of experience providing therapy to children, adults, couples, and families in psychiatric hospitals and outpatient clinics.
He serves on the Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution faculty at the Pepperdine University School of Law. He is an Associate Professor at the University of Newcastle Law School in Australia. In 2021, Bill received a Lifetime Achievement Award from the Academy of Professional Family Mediators.
Bill has a popular blog on the Psychology Today website with over 3.5 million views and is the author and co-author of twenty books on high-conflict personalities, including two award winners (see all books here):
A Quote From this Episode
"About 10% of people have these extreme behaviors, and they don't stop themselvesand they are dysfunctional."
About The International Leadership Association (ILA)
The ILA was created in 1999 to bring together professionals interested in studying, practicing, and teaching leadership. Plan for ILA's 25th Global Conference in Vancouver, British Columbia, October 12-15, 2023.
About The Boler College of Business at John Carroll University
Boler offers four MBA programs – 1 Year Flexible, Hybrid, Online, and Professional. Each MBA track offers flexible timelines and various class structure options (online, in-person, hybrid, asynchronous). Boler’s tech core and international study tour opportunities set these MBA programs apart. Rankings highlighted in the intro are taken from CEO Magazine.
The views of my guests do not constitute "truth." Nor do they reflect my personal views in some instances. However, they are views to consider, and I hope they help you clarify your perspecti
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