The decision to cut someone out of your life—whether a parent, a sibling, or a once-close friend—can feel both deeply necessary and impossibly fraught. But why does going no contact inspire so much shame, confusion, and second-guessing, especially when it’s often a tool for self-preservation? What does it really mean to choose absence over obligation?
In this episode, host Amanda Montell (@amanda_montell) is joined by Jeanette Tran, a professor at Drake University who explores the complexities of estrangement through an unexpected lens: Shakespeare. Drawing from centuries-old drama, Jeanette helps us parse why going no contact still feels so taboo, how literature mirrors (and sometimes distorts) our ideas of family and forgiveness, and why choosing peace can be the most radical act of all.
Further reading: Jeanette Tran’s essay “As more Americans go ‘no contact’ with their parents, they live out a dilemma at the heart of Shakespeare’s ‘King Lear’” in The Conversation.
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