209: Live Therapy with Neil Sattin, part 2: "Wow! The Changes Were Real!"

Last week you heard Part 1 of David’s TEAM Therapy session with Neil Sattin, who became pretty despondent and discouraged right after the first shut down because of the covid-19 pandemic in March of 2020. David and Neil went through the T = Testing and E = Empathy parts of TEAM, and David helped Neil develop a Daily Mood Log so he could record his negative thoughts and feelings at one specific moment at the end of a day when he was feeling like he hadn’t gotten enough work done. Perhaps you’ve had the same problem at times!

Today you’ll hear the A = Assessment of Resistance and M = Methods parts of the session. As they begin, David asks Neil the Magic Button and Miracle Cure questions, and Neil says that he definitely does want help and would push the Magic Button to make all of his negative thoughts and feelings on his Daily Mood Log disappear.

David cautions against that and suggests Positive Reframing, asking two questions about each negative thought and feeling.

1. What does this thought or feeling show about you that’s positive and awesome?
2. What are some potential benefits, or advantages, of this thought or feeling?

Here’s Neil’s list of Positives:

My sadness:

1. Shows that I’m ambitious
2. Motivates me to achieve a lot
3. Shows that I have high standards

My anxiety:

1. Shows that I’m responsible
2. Keeps me vigilant
3. Fuels me to take action
4. Reminds me that I’m doing important things

My guilt:

1. Shows that I have a moral compass

My feelings of defectiveness and inadequacy:

1. Show that I want to be a good role model
2. Show that I’m willing to be honest about my flaws
3. Show that I hold myself accountable
4. Show that I’m humble

My feelings of being alone show that:

1. I value connections with others
2. Allow me to feel close to people

My feelings of embarrassment and humiliation show that:

1. I have high standards and goals
2. I want my life to mean something
3. I value acceptance

My discouragement shows that:

1. I have a vision
2. I’m realistic about the many challenges I face and the sheer volume of work I have to do
3. I’m willing to face the truth

My frustration shows that:

1. I’ll persevere.
2. I won’t stop and give up.

Feeling annoyed and irritated:

1. Shows that I won’t tolerate things that get in my way
2. Gives me energy and determination

Feeling overwhelmed:

1. Reminds me that I might be taking on too much
2. Protects me from trying and failing
3. Shows that I’m looking for ways to take care of myself.

After listing these positives, Neil used the Magic Dial and indicated that he’d like to dial down his negative feelings to lower levels, rather than getting rid of them entirely, as you can see in the “% Goal” column of his Daily Mood Log.

Then they moved on to M = Methods, focusing first on Neil’s Negative Thought (NT):

“I’m not capable of getting organized. After identifying a number of distortions in the thought, Neil was able to generate a positive thought that fulfilled the necessary and sufficient conditions for emotional change:

1. The Positive Thought (PT) has to be 100% true.
2. The PT has to drastically lower your belief in the Negative Thought.

You can see this on his DML. David and Neil used a variety of techniques, including Externalization of Voices, to challenge the rest of his NTs. Neil re-rated his negative feelings at the end of the session. They all feel to zero except feeling alone, which went from 80 to 5, which was his goal.

Rhonda and David