315; On Behaviour change, motivation & mindset barriers that keep us where we DONT want to be. Navigating change w/ Ella Whitcomb-khan

Ella: @thefitnesspsych_ 

Me: @transformxruby

Fearful that they are never going to change

Communication; with ourselves & others -

People think they SHOULD know how to do things

External goals

Both sides of motivation

Do we need to listen to ourselves and actually rest

Or do we need to act to build momentum

I know what to do but im not doing it

Tradeoffs

Saying yes to something = no to other things as well

Everything serves you in some way

Flexibility VS restrained/rugged flexibility

i never had it to start with but thats where social media c

Motivation

Helping clients tap into intrinsic motivation

Why the groundwork is so important

.. motivation

When we don't enjoy something (which we need to do things we don't enjoy to get to where we want to be in the sense that its so different from where you were, of course you wont like it at first - but thats the identity piece and then realising that it can be something you do enjoy (like i hated exercise to start with and then that all changed as i realised the benefits and saw it changing me physically and etcetc

I feel this is where alot of people slip up because they failed in the past before bc they are the ones doing it to themselves

Or even with a coach they feel like this is how it SHOULD be

So they don't open up that they need to slow down

All or nothing thinking

Being self critical in the process

How this holds you back

How to navigate it and move forward from it

Mindset barriers

Feeling like they should have their shit together and it should be easy

i want to talk about ways to build up our confidence bucket and finding proof & our track record of the past times we did well and how to approach it then if we havent got one in the way that we would like to proceed forward - when there really is alot of change into the new identity

and also how at times its a fear but not knowing that its a fear because we cant recognise the emotion

for example a client comes to mind: she started a deficit and she already preempts falling off and sabotaging and the whole idea of being in a deficit she feels hungry just from that!

You arent going to love it all the time

You will always come across resistance hard doesn

Not being so focused on our body means letting ourself go

CHANGE in itself

process of Change

Physical

Mental

Communication comes in there again

There is no normal

compartmentalizing VS catastrophizing and blending it all together

- duality of thinking

2 things can exist

Its not EITHER/OR

It is AND

------ that was perfect --- WHY was it? --- i didnt p

Change not being linear and different for everyone if its something we want to last because theres usually alot of work to do and how our past experiences shape our process - ie belief in ourselves. Belief in general

Needing to fail and fail to get there and reframing failure

how to breakfree from cycles,

When life disrupts you

When clients only do something for the outcome, what happens when they get the outcome